Lossy's Journal

Seiga

We had opened a social club named Old Desire for the ladies of Gensokyo.

Seiga

We worked hard to rid them of the stress and fatigue of daily life, and alleviate their deep-rooted worries...

Seiga

But things inevitably change with time...

Seiga

The social club that was once deemed indispensable to life in Gensokyo is now a thing of the past...

Seiga

Old Desire has never faced such dark days!

Seiga

The club, that used to be bustling with people, is being forgotten...

Seiga

I'd be lying if I said it didn't bother me... but there's also cause to be happy.

Seiga

Yes, we don't get as many customers as we did before, but there are some who still visit us.

Seiga

We're here to soothe their wounded souls, and nothing will change that. It's our duty, and we value it greatly.

Seiga

Look, here comes a customer now.

Seiga

Welcome to Old Desireーa social club for the ladies!

Yoshika

WELCOME! We hope you enjoy your stay!

Seiga

Well done, Yoshika. Good posture and a beaming smile are the basics of hospitality. Glad to see you haven't forgotten.

Seiga

This is really bad! This is the worst situation Old Desire's ever faced!

Yoshika

Huh?! But you were just excited about that customer arriving!

Yoshika

I thought we were fine!

Seiga

That was all for show. You've got to try and start these things off on a positive note!

Yoshika

Oh, boy...

Seiga

Surely you're aware of the predicament we're in.

Yoshika

Well... yeah. Our precious club is in big trouble.

Yoshika

We might have to close for good...

Seiga

Wait. Yoshika, look at the entrance! I mean, REALLY look.

Yoshika

Hmmm... AH!

Koishi

Zzz... zzz... Hehe, Satori...

Yoshika

Whoa! We have a customer!

Seiga

One whole customer! Maybe we won't have to close after all!

Yoshika

Seiga...

Seiga

What? You're the one who said it!

Yoshika

Seiga... I think you know why this is happening.

Seiga

...Yes, you're right.

Seiga

We've never had fixed business hours, and lately, I've been neglecting a lot of the important stuff around here.

Seiga

Plus, we never make an effort to redecorate. It's no wonder the customers got bored and stopped coming.

Yoshika

It really is a shame how quickly things deteriorate if you don't take proper care of them...

Koishi

Zzz... It's so quiet... No one's around... I can sleep in peace here... Zzz.

Seiga

...

Seiga

We can't let our club shut down! We need to do something!

Yoshika

We all worked hard to make this place what it is. I don't want it to close down, either!

Seiga

We're going to fix this! It's time for the Old Desire Revival Project!

Yoshika

R-Revival Project?!

Seiga

This was supposed to be the top club, but it's a far cry from that now. Together, we're going to take it to new heights!

Seiga

We'll revamp Old Desire and provide people with a sense of luxury and peace of mind they've never experienced before!

Yoshika

*gulp*!

Seiga

Heehee, no need to look so worried. My plan is flawless!

Seiga

But we first need to gather people who can help bring back our glory days.

Yoshika

Are you gonna ask the old staff to come back?

Seiga

We'll need their help, too, but if we don't find some fresh faces, Old Desire will remain "old" forever.

Seiga

I already have one recruit in mind. And the one asleep right over there will bring her to us.

Koishi

Zzz... Hm? *yawn* Are you talking about me?

Seiga

Yes, we need you to help us with something important.

Koishi

Hm? Sure, why not? You're always letting me take naps here!

Seiga

Thank you. Now we just need to find some other helpers... But wait! There's one person we simply can't do without!

Seiga

We'll need her if we want to assemble a capable team.

AAAACHOOOO!

Reimu

Did you catch a cold? You know, they say sneezing is a sign someone somewhere is talking about you.

I think it's just a cold.

Then again, I feel fine...

Reimu

Either way, be sure to take care of yourself, OK?

Reimu

Staying physically fit is important, but with this gloomy weather, you gotta take care of your mental health too.

Reimu

Remember, the mind and the body are one. ...Geez, I'm beginning to sound like Eirin. I think I need a break.

Reimu

Let's wrap up work for today and enjoy a cup of tea. I have some premium tea leaves from Kourindou here somewhere...

Flandre

Gotcha! *squeeze*

AAAAAAAAAAH!

I-I can't... breathe... M-My back... OWWWW!

Flandre

AHAHAHAHAHA! You're so funny!

Flandre

Hey! Can I try that again?!

Satori

You probably shouldn't. I'm worried you might hurt her.

Flandre

It's OK! I'll give her a nice massage! She'll be fit and fine in no time!

Satori

That'll just break her beyond repair...

Okina

Come now, stop acting like I don't exist.

Okina

Don't forget, I'm the one who opened up a door on PLAYER's back to get you all here.

Flan, Satori, and Miss Okina together? That's rare.

Um, can someone explain what's going on here?

Okina

I understand why you're confused to see a sage, the mistress of Former Hell, and a vampire together...

Okina

But I'm sure you're not so ignorant as to need an explanation for why we'd come visit you.

Satori

We should still explain. We need her help, after all.

Flandre

PLAYER would never refuse! C'mon, hurry up and get this over with already!

Okina

I guess you're right. We were sent here by the wicked hermit, Seiga Kaku.

Okina

She invited us to work at her social club, but we need your help to set up the new consultation corner.

I thought it'd be something like that.

Are you talking about Old Desire?!

Satori

It seems like they've not been getting many customers lately, so she's hired us to turn things around.

Satori

Apparently, we were chosen because we possess abilities that can soothe customers' troubled minds.

Satori

When I heard about it from Koishi, I wasn't sure about helping out.

Satori

But Old Desire's always been a go-to place for her. She gets lost often, so I feel indebted to them for keeping her safe.

Satori

That's why I decided to join them.

Okina

I didn't have to think twice before making up my mind. I like their concept of solving people's problems.

Okina

It'll only lead to peace and order in Gensokyo. Besides, it's the perfect opportunity to show everyone what a noble god I am.

Flandre

I was scouted by Okina! She said my ability can help destroy problems quick!

Flandre

And I get to play outside! It was a no-brainer for me!

Flandre

Also, if I do Okina a favor, she'll have to save me from Remilia when she realizes I've escaped.

Okina

Don't worry. This mighty back door god has your back.

Satori

...Was that supposed to be funny?

Okina

Just forget about it.

Okina

Anyway, that's why we're here. We need one more member to complete the team. And that's you, PLAYER.

Okina

You're on good terms with everyone here. You can assist us and make sure we stay on track.

Satori

I heard you helped Old Desire get off the ground, so you must already know a lot about it. We'd love for you to join us.

After all that, I can hardly refuse, can I?

I'll do all I can for Old Desire!

Flandre

See, I told you. I knew she wouldn't refuse!

Satori

When did we say she would?

Okina

We finally have everyone we need. Now let's get to Old Desire! Seiga's waiting for us.

Seiga

Welcome back. That didn't take long.

Seiga

I'm glad to see you got everyone on board.

Satori

Yes, we can start right away.

Seiga

Oh, my. I'm thrilled to see you're so keen about this.

Satori

Th-That's not it! I was just letting you know that we're all set...

Seiga

I'm sorry. We can't start with the way things are right now.

Okina

What...?

Okina

We assessed the problem, made a plan, and assembled a team. What else do we need?

Seiga

Costumes, of course!

Everyone

Huh?

Seiga

Costumes, of course!

Okina

We heard you the first time...

Seiga

Each of you needs a special costume! Only then will we be ready to start!

Satori

Are you sure this is necessary? I'd prefer not to wear anything too flashy.

Seiga

It's absolutely necessary! It brings the team together!

Seiga

I asked the owner of Kourindou to make lovely outfits for you all! Come on, hurry up and change into them!

Flandre

AHAHAHAHA! It's kinda different from what I usually wear! I like it!

Satori

U-Um...

Seiga

Less complaining, more changing!

Satori

O-OK...

Seiga

Introducing Satori Komeiji! She can gauge a customer's worries in seconds! She'll be their first point of contact.

Satori

Wh-What did I get myself into...?

Seiga

Next up is our problem-solving strategist, Okina Matara! With her powerful ability, she'll support her fellow team members!

Okina

His skills are wasted running that antique store. I'll have to get him to make some new costumes for Satono and Mai.

Seiga

And here's our key to speedy resolutions, Flandre! Problems don't stand a chance against her destructive power!

Flandre

Wooooooow! This costume is sooooo cute! Well? Does it look good on me?!

Seiga

And finally, our overall support slash crisis manager, PLAYER, here to keep our members in check!

You all look so good!

How long can Miss Seiga keep up this enthusiasm...?

Seiga

It's PERFECT!

Seiga

Now, you're all official members of the consultation corner―

Seiga

―No, it'd be an insult to these lovely costumes if we went with such a basic name. Let me try that again.

Seiga

I hereby proclaim you official members of club Old Desire's Consultation Crew!

Seiga

Now, it's time to get to work! I want this place bustling with customers!

Consultation Crew

YEAAAAH!

Seiga

It's time for the Consultation Crew to get to work.

Seiga

But before that, it'd be best for you to meet the others.

Flandre

Others?

Satori

...Hmm, yes, I can see why that would be a good idea.

Okina

I know you've gone ahead and read her mind, but can you please fill us in? Who's she talking about?

Satori

Oops, sorry. Miss Seiga's talking about―

???

―Us, of course!

Sanae

Did someone call for soothing and peaceful vibes?! Sanae Kochiya, the shining star of Old Desire, is here!

Letty

Like a single glorious snowflake sparkling in the early summer sun... I'm Letty Whiterock, the shining star of Old Desire!

Junko

Sitting at number one ever since my electrifying transfer here―I'm Junko, Old Desire's real shining star.

Yoshika

Don't forget about me! I'm Yoshika Miyako, the shining star of Old Desire!

Keine

I help out here every now and then. I'm Keine Kamishirasawa. Nice to meet you.

Sanae

Whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you doing, Miss Keine?! What happened to the line I taught you?!

Keine

"A gust of wind called knowledge cutting through the social club," was it? That makes it sound like I hand out knowledge.

Keine

Knowledge is something you can attain only with the right attitude. It's precious and must be respected.

Keine

I also don't get why everyone's calling themselves the shining star of Old Desire. Showing off really isn't my style!

Letty

So you think we're all showoffs, huh? How rude.

Sanae

U-Um, you don't sound all that offended...

Sanae

A-And Miss Junko! Why did you have to go and say you're the "real" shining star?!

Junko

Because it's true. We're all stars, but I shine the brightest.

Sanae

*sob*... *sniff*... *sniff*...!

Yoshika

Cheer up, Sanae. I like your way of doing things.

Flandre

What's going on here?

It looks like they still get along!

It's my turn. I'm also a shining star of Old Desire!

Flandre

N-No kidding...

Satori

So these are the people we're supposed to look up to? I'm beginning to get a little worried about all of this...

Seiga

Don't worry. They might've messed up their entrances, but they've overcome countless problems. They're very reliable.

Seiga

You can ask them whatever you need to know. How to carry out your tasks, how to interact with customers... you name it!

Seiga

Oh, and before I forget, there's one more thing I wanted to tell you all.

Seiga

Starting now, you'll all have to take a test. The stars of Old Desire will be your examiners.

Okina

Are you serious? You're going to test ME?

Okina

We're here because you need our abilities. And now you want us to take a test? What's the meaning of this?

Satori

I was asked to come here to solve people's problems. No one said anything about other tasks.

Seiga

I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but you can't work here until you pass.

Sanae

It's OK, Miss Seiga. We'll take care of all the work. It'll be a breeze!

Satori

Huh?

Sanae

Whatever you can't do, we'll cover for you. We have more experience, after all.

Okina

Oh, really?

Sanae

And you don't need to get too worked up about the test. We'll go easy on you!

Flandre

Fine, I'll take this "test." But don't blame me for what happens after that... Hehehehe!

Sanae

M-Miss Seiga... are you sure we're going to be OK? I provoked them like you asked, so you better protect us!

Seiga

You did exactly what I wanted you to... but I think you should prepare to run, just in case.

Sanae

B-But I can't pass through walls like you can!

Letty

I told you not to overdo it...

Junko

No matter who wins, this is going to be interesting to watch.

Keine

I hope you realize none of us are safe.

Yoshika

Don't be such a coward, Sanae. Take responsibility for your actions!

Sanae

Th-That's mean.

Satori

So, what's this test all about?

Sanae

OK, I'll go first! In this test, I'll teach you how to carry dishes using bullets!

Okina

That's an odd way to carry dishes... Even with all my experience, I've not once tried that.

Sanae

The tricky part is not messing up the orders while keeping your bullets under control.

Flandre

That doesn't sound fun at all...

Satori

I'll give it a try. You two can watch to get an idea of how it's done.

Satori

I can read minds, so there's no way I'll mess up the orders. All I have to do is control my bullets.

Sanae

Someone sounds confident. C'mon, show me what you can do!

Sanae

Let's begin the first test!

Satori

Is this what you were looking for?

Sanae

Th-That was incredible... To think you're only a beginner...! That's some talent you've got!

Yoshika

She's better at this than you are. You've been taking too many days off.

Sanae

Eep! I-I'd like to think that's not true... but her performance is hard to argue with.

Sanae

Miss Satori, welcome to the Old Desire team!

Okina

Hmmm... I think I get it now.

Flandre

We're up next! That didn't look so hard!

Sanae

Oh, really?! Then, by all means, let's see what you can do!

Flandre

OK, now we've cleared the tests, is it time for me to destroy you all?

Sanae

H-Haha...! Don't be silly! It's time to start having fun working together!

Flandre

Heh...

Sanae

I-I don't like the way she's smiling at me!

Keine

We're getting nowhere. Can you stop messing around? The tests have only just started.

Sanae

Miss Keine! *sob* Thank you for coming to my rescue!

Keine

Oh... That wasn't really my intention, but you're welcome, I guess. Just calm down, OK?

Seiga

Working at a social club isn't only about waiting tables. If it were, we'd all be regular waitresses.

Satori

So you're saying we need hospitality skills?

Junko

Exactly. Don't let your guard down just because you passed the first test. The others won't be so easy.

Okina

That's interesting coming from a big shot like yourself. I hope you won't disappoint.

Junko

And I hope you're not all talk. Else you might end up embarrassing yourself.

Okina

Hehehe...

Junko

Tehehe...

Junko & Okina

Hahahaha!

They seem to be having fun.

Who's going to stop them if something goes wrong?

Sanae

Ow-ow-ow! My stomach hurts all of a sudden. I think I'll leave now. See ya!

Seiga

You can't leave. You're one of the examiners. And I have important work for you after the tests are over!

Sanae

I don't wanna do this! I'm gonna get caught in the crossfire! Why do I have to do all the dangerous stuff?!

Keine

Geez, it's going to take forever at this rate. If no one else wants to be an examiner, I'll do it.

Letty

No, let me. Things are heating up in here. I know just what to do.

Satori

Oh, good idea.

Okina

Satori, cut it out already. Tell us what's going on.

Satori

Oops, my bad. She wants to perform a test on the bullet show stage.

Letty

That's right. My snowy bullet show used to be pretty popular... especially during summer.

Letty

Of course, I don't expect you to use snow. You're free to decide your own theme.

Okina

Will we be competing to see whose show's better?

Letty

Yes, you'll have to fight in a battle while also making sure to dazzle the audience.

Okina

Understood. I'm ready to take the test.

Okina

It's basically creating art with bullets. Being the god of art, I can't lose.

Letty

I better bring my A-game, then. Let the show begin!

Letty

OK, I concede. Your show was brilliant.

Okina

That means a lot coming from you. Your show was wonderful too. I look forward to working with you.

Letty

Thank you. You passed with flying colors. I can't wait to perform with you on stage again.

Okina

Let's strive for artistic perfection. It'll be a cinch if we work together.

Satori

They're in their own little world. Meanwhile, we still need to take the test...

Flandre

Huh?! I don't know anything about artistic perfection!

Keine

Don't worry about those two. They're in a category of their own. You just need to give it your best.

Seiga

I knew I made the right decision selecting you ladies. You made light work of that test.

Satori

Everyone here is strong, and both the tests so far involved battles of bullets. It's no wonder we all passed so easily.

Seiga

I assume you're including yourself in "everyone?" Your confidence is reassuring.

Flandre

C'mon, let's start the next test already! I wanna get this over with and go wild!

Junko

I was thinking about testing your hospitality skills next... but maybe we should let off some steam first.

Keine

OK then, how about something that'll make use of all that pent-up energy? It's also an essential part of working here.

Flandre

What is it?! Do I get to crush someone?!

Keine

Obviously not! ...Actually, maybe you do. This test is about dealing with problematic customers.

Okina

Problematic customers, you say?

Keine

And by that, I mean those who play pranks on the club or those who try to hurt other customers.

Keine

Most of them are fairies. No matter how many times we drive them out, they keep coming back.

Flandre

So we need to get rid of them for good, yeah? Hehe, I wonder how I can do that...!

Keine

Yes, but it's not just about hurting them.

Keine

We need to get them to regret their actions while maintaining a pleasant and enjoyable atmosphere for the other customers.

Keine

Keep in mind that this is a place people come to for solace.

Satori

OK, so the goal is to get them out quick, but without causing a fuss?

Keine

Exactly. But it's easier said than done. You need to dial it down a lot, but not too much.

Flandre

So how far should I dial? Half of my usual strength? Or maybe a quarter?

Keine

That's what you need to find out. If you mess up in a real situation, things can get real bad real fast.

Seiga

Old Desire is all about helping customers unwind. A little horror isn't bad, but spare the gory stuff.

Yoshika

Seigaaa, I found some! I caught them setting up pranks in the back.

Letty

Looks like we're in luck. Now we have more targets for you to practice on.

Junko

Hehe, we might be in luck, but the fairies sure aren't! They would've had an easier time with us doing the punishing.

Keine

Hey, stop that! It won't be a proper test if they're all scared stiff.

Flandre

OK, let's do this before they all start crying!

Keine

*sigh* Maybe I should join in. At least that way, I'll be able to stop Flandre from overdoing it.

Flandre

HEHE! What did you think of that?!

Keine

Honestly... that was unexpected. You got it done quick, and you were in perfect control. I have no complaints.

Flandre

Hehehe!

Okina

That's a tough act to follow. I'd better focus!

Satori

Are you worried? I don't mind going next and showing you how it's done.

Okina

Hehe... That won't be necessary. Turns out we all had some steam to let off.

Seiga

Please don't go overboard. This is about preventing the club from going under. I don't want it destroyed.

Okina

These tests are so easy. It'd be more fun if they were a little more challenging.

Satori

Can you stop provoking them for no reason? You're only making our lives harder.

Flandre

I'm booored. Is it over yet?

Junko

Don't worry, there's only one more test.

Okina

Does that mean you're up next? Saving the worst till last, I see.

Junko

The worst? That's rude. No one's more kind and affectionate than I am.

Junko

But since you're still so full of confidence, maybe I should go all out.

Flandre

Booooooooo! That's not fair!

Satori

...

What's wrong, Satori?

Did you read Miss Junko's mind?

Satori

I don't see the point of explaining right now. You'll understand soon enough.

Junko

OK, here's what you'll be doing...

Consultation Crew

...

Okina

I can't believe Junko! Why is she making us clean up? Hey, Satori, what's she plotting?

Satori

Like I said, you'll understand soon enough. For now, just keep cleaning.

Flandre

*cough* *cough* This place is so dusty!

Junko

Then keep your mouth shut. Cleaning is an essential job―or rather, skill. You can start stocking shelves once you're done.

Flandre

So, I just have to line up the drinks on the shelves? That's it?

Okina

This is way too easy to be a test. Is this really going to give you insight into our abilities?

Satori

...

Junko

Less complaining, more stacking. The test isn't over yet.

Satori

Phew... Next, we need to redecorate. Miss Junko wants the waiting room to be a more comfortable space.

Okina

I know this is for our benefit too, but something doesn't feel right. She's only been giving us odd jobs.

Junko

Hm... OK, I think it's time now.

Junko

You can stop what you're doing. You all did fairly well.

Flandre

Huh?

Okina

Is it safe to assume we passed?

Junko

Yes. In truth, you'd already proved your abilities in the other tests.

Okina

Then what was the point of all this?

Junko

You're new here, which makes us your superiors. We simply needed to make that clear to you.

Junko

And bossing you around seemed like a good way to do that.

Sanae

Uh...

Junko

I just gave you a taste of it. If you start getting cocky, it's our job to take you down a peg.

Okina

I see... Let me guess, this was the Moriya shrine maiden's idea.

Sanae

I-I might've mentioned something similar happening in the outside world...

Okina

Well, whatever. And you, Satori. You knew about this from the start, didn't you?

Satori

Yes. But I felt it was necessary, so I went along with it.

Okina

You felt it was necessary to appease Junko's ego?

Satori

Whatever her reasoning may have been, I felt these tasks were important. I wanted us to try them for ourselves.

Satori

The two of you were already fed up with the tests. If I told you the truth, you would've refused to participate.

Flandre

Yeah, I was getting pretty bored...

Okina

I wouldn't have refused if I thought it was a test.

Okina

But this was just a way to dump odd jobs on us! Whose side are you on exactly?

Satori

Old Desire's side. I'm here because I want to repay them for being kind to Koishi.

Satori

I'm sure you also have a reason for being here.

Okina

...

Seiga

OK, that's enough.

Seiga

We're all on the same team here, so let's play nice.

Okina

But...

Seiga

Satori's right. There's no shame in doing odd jobs. You would've had to do it at some point anyway.

Seiga

You might not have enjoyed it, but I think it turned out to be quite a good learning experience.

Seiga

Since you all will be helping me run the club, I want you to know what that entails.

Seiga

That includes getting to know the existing members as well as reminding yourselves why you're here.

Seiga

Do that, and you'll have taken an essential step toward becoming a true member of this team.

Okina

All right, you win. Now I see why you're in charge here.

Flandre

I feel much better! I was getting fed up, but now I wanna give it my best!

Satori

Hehe...

Junko

Hm, I was simply trying to annoy you all, but it looks like Seiga found a way to turn it into an important lesson.

Sanae

Everything worked out fine. Stop adding fuel to the fire!

Letty

That's not fitting behavior for a veteran team member...

Keine

I'd say this served as a good learning experience for us, too. We need to remember that we were all once beginners.

Yoshika

Seiga's the best!

Okina

That's all well and good, but the fact remains that Junko was picking on us.

Okina

I hope you weren't expecting us to let that slide.

Flandre

Yeah! Do you know how difficult it was for me not to destroy you?!

Seiga

Hmmm... I guess you have a point.

Seiga

OK then, how about you all make up with a battle of bullets?

Satori

I'll join in too. Honestly, I wasn't happy about the situation either.

Junko

OK, you're on! Let's have an old members vs. new members battle to decide the new pecking order!

Sanae

Huh?! Why do we have to get involved?!

Letty

I don't really like the idea of fighting my own team members...

Junko

Stop complicating things. Just think of it as showing the newbies who's boss.

Keine

Isn't there a more peaceful way of doing this?

Okina

Deciding the pecking order based on strength, huh? I couldn't have asked for anything more!

Flandre

Hehehehe! You'll regret underestimating us!

Satori

No matter the outcome, let's not forget we're a team.

Yoshika

Yeah! Watch me, Seiga! I'm gonna do my best!

Okina

Gah! That was good!

Junko

It was more entertaining than I expected it to be!

Seiga

OK, that's enough. It's a draw!

Junko & Okina

Grrrr!

Flandre

Huh?! It was just getting interesting!

Satori

Now, now. We can settle this later. That'll give us something to look forward to.

Flandre

Hm... That doesn't sound so bad!

Okina

I guess if Flandre's OK with it... I don't want to turn into the god of whining.

Junko

But first, let me apologize for earlier. I applaud your brilliant battle skills.

Seiga

When things get rough, it only makes you tough. I hope there are no hard feelings.

Seiga

Let's work together to reopen Old Desire and make it the best social club in Gensokyo!

Old Desire

YEAH!

Sanae

Miss Satori, can you please bring those over there?

Satori

All right. And then you want me to check on the cutlery, right?

Sanae

Yes! It's like you read my mind!

Keine

Phew... There's so much stuff we can throw out.

Flandre

It's a pain carrying all this! Let me take care of it!

Keine

Nice garbage disposal, Flandre. But can you be a little more restrained next time?

Letty

I'm done preparing the ice cream. I think I got carried away and made too much, though.

Yoshika

And I finished making the dolls we'll be giving out to all our customers. I added a new one this time!

Satori

Wh-When did you― Is that doll... me?

Junko

Don't you think we need to make this place look fancier?

Okina

I don't know, I think it has a nice balance. Although now you mention it, maybe it does look a little plain.

Seiga

Heehee, this is nice! I don't know how to describe it. It's just... nice!

Seiga

Good job, everyone. It's already pretty late, but we're done with the opening preparations!

Seiga

We're all ready to reopen Old Desire! I'm sure all our customers will appreciate the effort we've put in!

Sanae

It was a lot of work, but it was worth it!

Satori

Now let's get a good night's rest so we can be in top form tomorrow!

Flandre

I'm SOOO tired... I just wanna eat some ice cream and relax!

Letty

You can have some of the extra ice cream I made. Think of it as your reward for clearing the tests.

Flandre

Really?! YAY! I'm gonna eat a whole lot―

Seiga

A customer? At this hour? But we haven't even put up the shop sign yet.

Keine

Don't tell me the prankster fairies are back...

???

How could you mistake a charismatic vampire like me for a rabble of fairies?

Flandre

EEK!

Remilia

I used to be a regular here, in case you've forgotten.

Okina

Remilia? What are you doing here?

Remilia

I'll be asking the questions. How dare you sneak my adorable little sister out of the mansion.

Flandre

*slowly sneaking away*

Remilia

Sakuya.

Sakuya

Young mistress, where do you think you're going?

Flandre

EEEEEEEP!

Sakuya

I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to restrain you. I have orders from Lady Remilia.

Remilia

Sorry for barging in before your grand opening. We'll be on our way. I wish your club all the best.

Okina

Wait. We can't let you take Flandre. I apologize for taking her out without your permission, but...

Flandre

I'm sorry, Remilia! I wanna work here with everyone!

Remilia

You're not forgiven. How could you sneak out behind my back. Argh! Just thinking about it makes me mad.

Remilia, please let her stay!

We need her here!

Remilia

Hm? I see even PLAYER is involved in this.

Remilia

I guess I do owe you a favor or two... OK then, how about this?

Remilia

She can work here, so long as you prove she's up to the task.

Satori

So basically, you want us to give you a little pre-opening demonstration, right?

Remilia

I see you still have no qualms about interrupting people. But yes, that's what I'm asking for.

Remilia

If Flan can convince me she can handle this, I'll allow her to stay.

Flandre

All right! I'll show you how grown-up I can be!

Sakuya

That's all we have to say. Now it's up to you to decide, Seiga.

Seiga

I don't want to lose one of our outstanding new members. If it's a demonstration you want, that's exactly what you'll get.

Remilia

Hehe... great. We'll be back soon with the others.

Sakuya

Good luck, young mistress.

Flandre

*sob* I'm sorry, you guys. This is all my fault...

Okina

Stop that. We're all friends here.

Satori

We'll get through this together.

Flandre

Yeah! I wanna stay here and be part of the team!

Remilia

Come on, Flan. Show me your hospitality skills.

Flandre

It's gonna be OK... I just gotta stay calm and do what everyone taught me!

Flandre

Welcome! I'm Flandre Scarlet. I'll be serving you tonight!

Flandre

So how was it? I hope I lived up to your expectations...

Remilia

Let's hear from everyone else first.

Meiling

You were amazing! I especially liked the way you served the dishes on bullets! That was some high-level performance!

Patchouli

It was interesting to see a bullet show focused on dazzling the audience.

Sakuya

Your service was on point. You knew exactly what we needed when we needed it. Thanks to you, I had a very pleasant time.

Koakuma

This place is so well-kept! The glasses are sparkly clean and there's not a spec of dust in sight.

Remilia

Agreed.

Remilia

My goodness, Flan. When did you learn to do all this? I take my eyes off you for a second, and you're all grown up.

Flandre

S-So does this mean...?

Remilia

Yes, you passed. I'm sure the customers will be most satisfied with your service.

Remilia

But more than that, I think you can learn a lot by being here. And that's why I have no reason to stop you.

Flandre

Hehe, thanks, Remilia!

Flandre

We weren't ready for your visit today, so we couldn't show it to you, but I'll be doing another special job, too.

Satori

Yes, serving drinks isn't her main role. She's part of a crew that aims to solve our customers' problems.

Flandre

We call ourselves the Consultation Crew!

Remilia

Oh, wow. That sounds interesting. Maybe I'll come for a consultation sometime.

Satori

I doubt we'll see you for a while though.

Remilia

What do you mean?

Satori

I just thought... now you've given Flandre your blessing to work here, you have one less problem to worry about.

Remilia

Hey! When you've lived as long as I have, it's only natural to have more than a few problems!

Remilia

Gah, you ruined the moment! Sakuya, gather everyone up. We're going home!

Sakuya

Very well.

Remilia

Oh, and Flan, don't forget to apply sunscreen during the day!

Flandre

Got it!

Flandre

Psst. What else was Remilia worried about?

Satori

Hmm... She didn't ask for advice about anything, so I have no clue.

Satori

If I had to guess, I'd say she just came here to make sure you were OK.

Seiga

It's time to reopen Old Desire! Let's get this party started!

Sanae

Whoa?! There's a sea of people here! I can't see a single free spot. And it all happened in the blink of an eye!

Letty

Maybe it's thanks to the fliers we distributed?

Keine

Perhaps, but I think the biggest reason is over there.

Junko

Most of the customers have their eyes on them, but no one's brave enough to go over there.

Yoshika

It's like they're all curious, but they're hoping someone else will go first.

Seiga

It's a lot of pressure being the first to make a move, but it looks like one of them's plucked up the courage.

Marisa

Sup-sup-suuuuuup! You better rejoice 'cause here comes your first client!

Marisa

I hear you lot can solve any problem. Then solve mine!

Flandre

It's Marisa! Welcoooooooome!

Okina

I can't believe you're our first client... I didn't know you were capable of worrying about things.

Satori

Sorry, we're not here to get you out of trouble. You must be mistaking us for some other consultation corner.

Marisa

You guys are so rude!

Satori

All right, go ahead. What trouble have you gotten yourself into?

Marisa

I'm genuinely worried over here! I never said anything about "trouble!"

Marisa

Recently, a lot of fairies have been coming to my shop. I mean, they're cute and all, but it's getting out of hand.

Okina

So they're up to their usual pranks, huh? Sounds like trouble to me.

Marisa

...Fine, I guess you could call it that. But that doesn't mean I'm not actually worried.

Marisa

I really want to get rid of them. So, are you guys gonna help me, or what?

Okina

Satori, can you verify she's speaking the truth?

Satori

...Essentially, yes.

Marisa

Are you seriously doubting your first client?!

Okina

Of course. We won't tolerate you lying or going behind our back.

Marisa

The lying, sure... but who are you to talk about going behind people's backs?!

Okina

It was just a figure of speech.

Okina

But, OK. We'll help you out. We have a wide range of expertise. We can solve any problem within seconds.

Marisa

I sure hope you can...

Okina

Hm, there really are a lot of fairies here.

Flandre

It's so messy! There are books and things just thrown around!

Marisa

That's 'cause the fairies have taken a liking to all the magic books and items.

Marisa

Now you guys are helping me, can you also clean up the junk that brought the fairies in to begin with?

Flandre

Do you really need us for that? Aren't you just too lazy to do it yourself?

Satori

Apparently, getting rid of the fairies wasn't her real goal. What she actually wants is for us to clean up her mess.

Marisa

Eep!

Okina

I guess you didn't lie to us... but you weren't exactly truthful, either!

Marisa

Your whole thing is that you solve problems, so I figured, you know, you'd be able to help me out!

Satori

Well, I knew you had an ulterior motive when we accepted your request, but it wouldn't have looked good if we refused.

Okina

All the other customers were watching us.

Flandre

Grrr... I can't believe our very first client has us doing an odd job!

Marisa

Now, now, let's learn to be a little flexible. Come on, you can finish this in no time!

I guess this is all part of building our reputation!

I'm sure we'll get better jobs if we keep at it!

Okina

Exactly. We're all pros here, so let's tidy up like pros!

Flandre

Fairies, junk, and trash! All gone! BOOM!

Marisa

AH! There were items in there I was thinking about keeping!

Satori

Don't worry. I already read your mind and figured out which ones you wanted.

Marisa

Wow! That's impressive!

Satori

And got rid of them.

Marisa

What?!

Satori

Just kidding. I've kept them separate.

Marisa

Ph-Phew...

Flandre

Yeah! Problem solved!

Okina

Problem solved, indeed! Actually, that should be our catchphrase.

Okina

All right! "Problem solved" is our catchphrase from here on out!

Flandre

Yeaaaaah!

Satori

I like it. It's perfect for our crew.

Flandre

We're baaaaack!

Satori

And we solved Marisa's problem!

Yoshika

Oh, hey! You're back already?! Come here, quick!

Okina

Is something wrong?

Yoshika

Some really gloomy customers walked in, and it's killing the vibe. Can you talk to them?

Aya

M-Momiji... The other crow tengu...

Aya

I, uh... don't know how to put this...

Momiji

I have something to tell you too... Um...

Momiji

...No, never mind.

Aya

...

Momiji

...

Okina

...Yeesh. You're bothering the other customers. Step outside. Now!

Miss Okina, calm down!

We need to hear them out first!

Okina

Sorry, I got a bit carried away. I blame Marisa for putting me in a bad mood.

Momiji

Who are you guys?

Flandre

We're the Consultation Crew! We help alleviate our customers of any worries or concerns they may have!

Satori

And it seems like something's really bothering the two of you. Why don't you fill us in?

Aya

Hm... It's too awkward for us to talk to each other about it.

Momiji

And we don't want to bother anyone at the club. I guess we could use your help.

Momiji

Actually... we got involved in a little dispute, and it was completely exhausting.

Aya

That's why I came to this club to relax. But unfortunately, Momiji had the same idea...

Flandre

Soooo you're both worried about this dispute?

Momiji

Yeah... It all began when the crow tengu started criticizing us white wolf tengu.

Momiji

They were calling us lazy and irresponsible...

Aya

That's not how it started! We only said those things 'cause the white wolf tengu refused to work!

Aya

We were just expressing our frustration! Then you guys decided to make a big deal about it!

Momiji

Nuh-uh! We went on strike AFTER you insulted us. This wouldn't have happened if you guys kept your mouths shut!

Momiji & Aya

GRRRRRRR!

Okina

A classic she-said, she-said. Nothing they say lines up. It's either a big misunderstanding or a pride thing.

Flandre

I guess we're gonna have to use our secret weapon...

Okina

Yep.

Satori

All right. I'll extract the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

Momiji & Aya

...

Satori

Oh... so that's what this is about.

Okina

Tell us what you learned, and I'll come up with a solution.

Satori

This whole dispute arose from a misunderstanding linked to an article Miss Aya wrote.

Aya

M-Me?!

Satori

Do you remember writing an article about the white wolf tengu's obsession with tengu dai-shogi?

Aya

A-Ah, yes... I remember. But what's that got to do with anything?

Satori

You wrote about their passion for the game and how much time they spend practicing.

Satori

Your article gave some crow tengu the impression that white wolf tengu do nothing but play tengu dai-shogi.

Momiji

That's not true! We only play when we're on break!

Satori

And that's why I called it a misunderstanding.

Satori

One that led to this dispute between crow tengu and white wolf tengu.

Satori

At least, that's what I could surmise from reading your minds. Some things were based on my own speculation.

Aya

C-Come to think of it, that's probably what happened...

Momiji

Y-Yeah, I felt that too...

Flandre

Soooo, the problem was Aya's article?

Aya

Eep?!

Satori

It's true the article is what started all this.

Satori

But, she had no intention of damaging the white wolf tengu's reputation. I can vouch for that.

Satori

She just wanted everyone to have a fun article to read. Only, it appears to have backfired.

Aya

Th-Thank you...

Momiji

I see... Well then, I guess I can't blame her for anything.

Aya

I'm sorry... All of this happened because of my article.

Momiji

You don't need to apologize. I got angry with the crow tengu based on a misunderstanding.

Momiji

But even though we've cleared things up here, the problem is far from over.

Momiji

Everyone in the tengu community knows about this by now. I'm sure even the Great Tengu are worried...

Momiji

Extremists are going around starting battles. It's going to be really difficult for us to stop them now.

Momiji

I'm a white wolf tengu, and you're a crow tengu. If we don't side with our own, it might only cause more problems.

Aya

But we can't sit here and do nothing...

Okina

That's what we're here for.

Flandre

You can count on us! We can solve any problem!

Momiji & Aya

Thanks, you guys!

Okina

Speed is of utmost importance when dealing with a matter like this. Luckily, we can use my ability!

Okina

Let's go to the Youkai Mountain and solve this problem!

Flandre

Oh, wow. There are so many tengu fighting.

Okina

Tengu attacking their own kind... That's something you don't see too often anymore.

Satori

We don't have time to chitchat! We need to stop them, quick!

Okina

That oughta teach them a lesson. We ended up being a little rough, but speed was our priority.

Satori

Another problem solved. Now let's get back to the club and put our clients at ease.

Flandre

Yeah! Problem solved! I hope we get more jobs like this one!

Satori

Try not to act so cheerful in front of the clients, OK?

Seiga

Good job, everyone. The customers have been talking about you all.

Okina

Makes sense. We've solved two problems already. Let's keep it up and help more people.

Seiga

Excellent. Now, let me introduce you to your next client. She got here while you were out.

Flandre

Who did? I don't see anyone around...

Seiga

Look down...

Flandre

Why down...? HUH?!

Shinmyoumaru

Finally. I was about to fall asleep waiting for you.

Flandre

Aww! She's so small and cute, like a little doll!

Shinmyoumaru

Hey, stop being so rough! Ow-ow-ow!

Flandre

This reminds me of the doll I got from Remilia. I got bored of it pretty quickly and made it go kaboom!

Shinmyoumaru

Wh-Wh-Whaaaat?! H-Help! H-Help meee!

Seiga

Gosh, Flandre. You're supposed to comfort our customers, not scare them! Anyway, I'll let you all take care of this.

Shinmyoumaru

Eeeeeep! Don't abandon me!

Satori

I think that's enough, Miss Flandre. We're going to get nowhere by frightening our new client.

Flandre

OK! Sorry for messing around!

Shinmyoumaru

N-Not at all! I guess I overdid my performance and made you think I was actually scared!

Satori

Sure... So, what do you want from us?

Shinmyoumaru

Oh, right.

Shinmyoumaru

The thing is, I lost something important to me. I want you to help me find it.

Okina

Hm, a lost item, huh?

Flandre

Soooooooo what is it?!

Shinmyoumaru

It's the sheath of my sword. It's kind of difficult to explain, but I sometimes lose track of it...

Okina

In that case... Satori, you're up.

Satori

So, basically, you like to swing your sword around, but you fail to realize when you've dropped the sheath.

Shinmyoumaru

*gulp*!

Satori

That's dangerous, you know?

Okina

If she dropped it without realizing, that means she doesn't know where it could be.

Satori

If only you had some information to help us narrow down our search...

Shinmyoumaru

Yeah, but I don't even know when I lost it.

I didn't know you actually had a sheathe.

It'll be impossible to find at this rate.

Okina

Heh. I'm a sage and a god. Doing the impossible is kind of my thing.

Flandre

What's your plan?

Okina

We don't need a plan. We're going to scour every corner of Gensokyo for it.

Shinmyoumaru

That's... not as cool as I was expecting.

Flandre

I know, right?

Okina

What do you take me for?

Okina

I'm the ultimate and supreme great sage of Gensokyo! And as the name suggests, I can find a needle in a haystack!

Okina

I've laid out a back door surveillance network throughout Gensokyo. Let me show you a glimpse of my immense power.

Shinmyoumaru

WH-WHOA! This is such overkill, but it's amazing!

Okina

Let me see... Ah, there it is.

Flandre & Shinmyoumaru

That was fast!

Satori

Where is it?

Okina

It's right next to Suzunaan. A couple of fairies are playing around with it.

Shinmyoumaru

Suzunaan? But my sword is always sheathed whenever I go there.

Satori

Maybe you started swinging your sword as soon as you left the shop.

Shinmyoumaru

Ah! You're right!

Okina

Anyway, I've located the item. Let's go get it back.

Okina

See? We got here in the blink of an eye. That's how great I am! And that's how awesome my back doors are!

Shinmyoumaru

Look! That's my sheathe those fairies are playing with!

Satori

Now the owner has identified it, let's quickly get it back. That'll be another problem solved!

Shinmyoumaru

My precious sheathe! You've finally come back to me!

Flandre

I'm glad you found it!

Satori

I almost didn't need to do anything this time.

Okina

It's all about who's best suited for the job. You did most of the work last time, and this time, it was me.

Flandre

That means it's gonna be my turn next! I'm not gonna be out done by you guys!

Okina

Like I said, it's about who's best suited for the job. You're here because I know you've got potential.

Okina

And I'm sure you'll get your time to shine. We're counting on you!

Flandre

Yeah! I'm gonna save energy for my shiny time!

Letty

Welcome back. It sounds like you solved another problem!

Letty

You're going to have a lot more coming your way, so you better buckle up! We're trying to make a comeback, after all!

Satori

That's fine with us. We won't rest while there are troubled customers waiting.

Letty

But if you burn out, you won't be able to help anyone. Just make sure you don't overdo it, OK?

Okina

Thanks, but you don't need to worry. It's my job to manage the team, and that's exactly what I'm doing.

Letty

That's reassuring. We're all rooting for you, so please do your best!

Yuugi

Oh, hey! Is the Consultation Crew back? Wow, you've got some impressive members there.

Flandre

You bet! Are you our new client?

Yuugi

Yeah, I'm in a bit of a fix, so I decided to come here.

Satori

Very well. Why don't you start by telling us your problem? We need to see if it's something we can help you with.

Yuugi

Do you even need an explanation? Go ahead, read my mind.

Satori

Sometimes it's better to hear from the client directly. It lets us all see how they're dealing with the situation emotionally.

Yuugi

I guess that makes sense... It'd be embarrassing to hear someone else explain how I feel.

Yuugi

I'll tell you the whole story.

Yuugi

I had some work above ground today, so I came up here from the Underworld using the usual hole.

Yuugi

Everything was fine... until the passage caved in behind me.

Yuugi

It's almost completely blocked. Even if I finish my work, I won't be able to go home.

Yuugi

Then I remembered you guys.

Yuugi

Koishi used to come here often, right? She told me you're very reliable.

Yuugi

So I came here to ask for your help. I've been waiting for ages!

Okina

So, basically, you want us to clear the hole, right?

Yuugi

Exactly.

Okina

Another odd job!

Yuugi

This is a real problem for me. I have plans to meet someone here, so I can't even do anything about it myself.

Yuugi

Can you please help?

Satori

This might be another odd job, but the fact is that our client's in distress.

Satori

Also, Miss Okina... this job is perfect for―

Okina

Ah, yes. It's finally Flandre's turn.

Flandre

Hm?

Yuugi

Does this mean...?

Okina

Yes, the Consultation Crew accepts your request! Just relax, and go about your business. You can count on us.

Yuugi

Haha! That's great! I'll leave the rest to you guys!

Okina

Oh, wow. The passage is completely blocked off. She definitely underplayed how bad it was.

Flandre

I dunno much about cave-ins, but do they happen a lot?

Okina

They can be man-made or naturally occurring. But in either case, it's hard to imagine they happen often.

Satori

This one was probably made-made. In fact, it was almost definitely Yuugi-made.

Flandre

Really?!

Satori

It looks like the fairies tried to play a prank on her soon after she got out.

Satori

Perhaps when she chased them off, she sent one of them hurtling into the wall. Or maybe it was a stray bullet.

Okina

Ugh, fairies again! Or maybe the oni is to be blamed.

Satori

If this was a natural occurrence, the impact wouldn't be so localized.

Satori

I can't think of anything else that could've caused this, so it must've been her. Unfortunately, she doesn't know that!

Even an oni doesn't scare those crazy fairies...

Look! I can see Yuugi's fistmark here!

Flandre

So technically, she's just paying for her own mistake. Why do we have to do all this work for her?

Okina

We said we'd help. We can't go back on our word now.

Okina

But I don't think we'll have to work for this one...

Satori

You're up, Flandre.

Flandre

Oh! I get it! I can destroy the rubble blocking the passage with my power!

Flandre

Are you ready, rubble? Take... THIS!

Okina

Way to go! I knew this would be a piece of cake for you!

Flandre

Ehehe... Whew! I feel better after using up some of that energy I'd been storing!

Satori

...Hm, maybe you can use more before we go back.

Flandre

Huh? Eek! What's that?! Weird ghost things are coming out of the hole!

Satori

They're vengeful spirits from the Underworld. They must've been drawn to the sound of the explosion.

Okina

Satori and I weren't of any help before, so we'll take care of this lot to make up for it!

Okina

Fools. Go back to the Underworld!

Flandre

Bye-byeeeeee!

Satori

I think the passage is clear now. We even sent those vengeful spirits back down there. I'd say this is problem solved.

Okina

I wonder if Yuugi's done with her work.

Yuugi

Oh, hey! Welcome back.

Satori

We've solved your problem. But your work doesn't seem to have gone all that well...

Yuugi

Yeah, it's kind of a long story.

Okina

Just when we thought our job was done... Tell us what happened.

Yuugi

OK, but first, I gotta introduce you to someone. You've probably already met, but still.

Reisen

H-Hello.

Okina

Aren't you the moon rabbit from Eientei? What are you doing with an oni from the Underworld?

Reisen

It's work-related. It happens from time to time.

Reisen

Yuugi put in an order for a large quantity of medicine, and I was supposed to deliver it to her.

Reisen

I brought her order, but...

Yuugi

The problem is that it's nowhere near the amount I asked for.

Okina

Isn't that an oversight on Eientei's part?

Reisen

No, that's not it! Master worked tirelessly to complete the order!

Yuugi

Then why didn't you bring it all?

Reisen

Don't be ridiculous! There's no way I'd be able to carry all of it by myself!

Yuugi

Really? I could've carried it with one hand. Or maybe even just my fingertips.

Satori

Don't forget you're an oni with super strength...

Yuugi

Yeah, but if I could carry it with one hand, surely she could've made do with two. She could've put stuff on her back too!

Reisen

Do I look that strong to you?!

Flandre

Wow...

Yuugi

If that wasn't possible, then couldn't you have just asked someone to help you?

Flandre

Yeah! There are tons of rabbits at Eientei!

Reisen

Well, I couldn't get a hold of Tewi today...

Reisen

I bet she knew I'd ask for help, so she took the other rabbits and went into hiding! She's so mean!

Yuugi

I KNOW! Why don't you ask these guys to carry it for you?

Reisen

What?! They'd do that?!

Okina

Hold up! We're the Consultation Crew, not the Odd Jobs Crew!

Yuugi

But she's your client. Or, at least, a potential client.

Yuugi

Are you seriously gonna make her deliver everything by herself? Don't you feel sorry for her?

Satori

That's not fair...

Yuugi

Well, maybe it's not my place to say. But surely you can't turn her away?

Reisen

Miss Yuugi told me what you guys can do!

Reisen

I know it's a bit of an odd job, but can you please help me?!

Okina

Ugh...!

Satori

How can we say no to that?

Okina

I-I guess we have no reason to refuse if it's an official request! We'll solve your problem! We'll solve ALL your problems!

Flandre

Aren't you getting a bit carried away?

Reisen

Thank you!

Okina

We just need to bring the medicine from Eientei, right? It'll only take seconds with my ability!

Yuugi

Can I make an additional request?

Flandre

This doesn't sound good...

Yuugi

Don't give me that look. I also have to deliver that medicine. I was wondering if you could do it for me.

Flandre

Aha! I knew it wasn't good!

Yuugi

I mean, I could do it, but I'm kinda worried about carrying it all through the tight passages underground.

Yuugi

What if I slip and drop it? It'd be much safer to use Okina's brilliant power. That way, everyone's happy!

Okina

Pretty sure you're not counting us in that "everyone." But seeing as you complimented my ability... I'll do it!

Yuugi

ALL RIGHT!

Yuugi

You gotta deliver it to Kisume and Yamame. Make sure they get it, OK?

Satori

So you used Miss Reisen to get us to do your work for you.

Yuugi

Not at all. Things just ended up that way.

Satori

...I can read minds, you know?

Yuugi

Tsk!

Satori

*sigh* Well, all right. The others are willing to help you, so I'll let it slide.

Okina

Come on, Flandre! This is another test we have to clear on the road to excellence!

Flandre

I don't wanna! Just admit she tricked you into it!

Okina

N-Nonsense! We're simply carrying out a request made by a client!

Reisen

So, you guys are gonna help me... right?

Okina

Hey, Flandre! It's dangerous to throw the medicine together with bullets!

Satori

You blew away all the nearby youkai...

Flandre

I was just so angry!

Flandre

But I feel better now.

Okina

PLAYER, don't forget it's your job to keep her in check.

Flan tried to stay calm. Let's go easy on her this time.

If it happens again, I'll, um... try my best to stop her.

Flandre

We're done, right? Can we go back to the club now?

Satori

Well, since we're already in the Underworld, I thought we could check if everyone in Former Hell is OK.

Okina

I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. The residents here are pretty tough.

Parsee

*sob* It hurts. It hurts so bad.

Flandre

D-Don't tell me that huge bump on your head is from...?!

Parsee

A stone fell from nowhere and hit me on the head!

Parsee

I'm miserable here, and you guys are having fun! Ugh, I'm jealous! I'm so jealous! And in pain!

Okina

See, look how tough they are...!

Satori

Yes, but I feel bad for her. Luckily, there's some spare medicine.

Okina

Did you not see how upset she is? I really don't think she'll just accept your medicine without a fuss...

Parsee

I've unlocked a new type of hashihime jealousy―painlousy! ...Or not. *collapse*

Okina

Gosh, it's all because you wouldn't take the medicine. You would've saved yourself from another bump.

Parsee

This one's way bigger than the first one! And who are you to talk? You're the ones who gave it to me!

Flandre

But it's gone thanks to the medicine! You can relax now.

Satori

Do visit Old Desire some time. I'm sure it'll heal the pain in your heart.

Flandre

Mmmmmmh! An ice-cold bottle of Shiri-Cola sure hits the spot after a job well done!

Okina

Can you cut it out with the weird noises?

Satori

We finally got a break. We should use this time to rest. It's just a matter of time till our next client shows up―

Chen

Consultation Crew! Help me!

Flandre

Oh, look! It's the kitty cat from the gap youkai's place!

Satori

...You think I jinxed it, don't you?

Okina

You shouldn't read my mind without permission!

Chen

I have no one else to turn to! Please help me! You'll help me, right? Pretty pleeeeeeeeeeease!

Okina

What's the problem? Couldn't you just ask your master or your master's master?

Chen

EEEP! Lady Okina?! U-Um... I-I'm Lady Yukari's...

Okina

I know I'm a sage, but you don't need to be so tense. Just think of me as one of the club staff.

Chen

O-OK! I'll tell you everything! *deep breath* *deep breath*

Satori

Miss Yukari asked you to do something, but you don't remember what it was, right?

Chen

...Huh? Um, yeah.

Okina

You know... you need to learn to read the room before you go ahead and read minds.

Satori

Sorry. She was rather shaken up.

Satori

I thought we'd be able to get more accurate info this way.

Okina

Well, she seems to have calmed down now. Chen, tell us everything.

Chen

U-Um... She pretty much said it all.

Okina

...

Satori

S-Sorry...

Okina

Cheer up. You're an admirable servant! My two servants, Mai and Satono are perfect, but you're not bad either!

Chen

Th-Thank you! But I don't think I'm worthy of your praise...

Chen

How could I forget what I was asked to do? I tried retracing my steps, but I just can't remember...

Chen

That's when I heard about you guys! I thought you might be able to help, so *sniff* I came... *bawl*

Chen

And *sniff* I couldn't even explain my own problem! *sniff* I'm so useless!

Okina

See, Satori? Try reading my mind like you did earlier.

Satori

Why would I...?

Okina

Oh, really? Would you prefer if I said it out loud, then?

Satori

Gah! Fine, I get it! I upset Chen by reading her mind!

Flandre

Are you OK? I know it hasn't been easy.

Chen

*sniff* I'm sorry...

Okina

So Yukari is involved... This is going to be a tough problem to solve.

Satori

Can't you just ask her what your task was?

Chen

I'm too afraid to do that. And I don't want to disappoint her...

Okina

Yes, she would probably get really mad since she's not a compassionate sage like me.

Chen

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Satori

Now look who upset her.

Okina

M-My bad. When it comes to Yukari, I can't help myself.

Flandre

But, you just need to remember what she told you to do, right? Can't Satori read her mind?

Satori

No, not if she's completely forgotten it.

Okina

Well then, that leaves us with one option.

Flandre

Ooooh! Do you have a plan?!

Okina

Leave it to me. I've known Yukari for a long time. Just watch me outwit her...

Satori

Hello?

Yukari

Why, hello there. This is unexpected. What brings you here?

Satori

I don't really have a reason as such. I was just in the area.

Yukari

Oh, really? Hmmm...

Satori

Y-Yep...!

Yukari

So, how's Chen? And Okina, you can stop hiding and come out now.

Satori

H-How?!

Okina

Damn you, Yukari! How did you know?! Did you figure out a way to start reading minds or something?!

Yukari

Hah, gotcha.

Okina

Y-You tricked us?!

Yukari

Old Desire recently reopened with its brand-new team, the Consultation Crew.

Yukari

Did you seriously think I didn't know about that? Or have you forgotten what I'm capable of?

Yukari

Chen has been gone for an awfully long time, and then you show up out of the blue.

Yukari

All the clues are right there. Anyone could've figured out what was going on.

Flandre

Okina...

Okina

Stop giving me that look. I didn't have enough time to come up with a decent plan, OK?

Miss Okina, I think we should just tell her everything.

We're sorry, Miss Yukari!

Yukari

Don't worry about it. I'm just happy I was able to leave Okina speechless.

Okina

D-Damn you...!

Yukari

Hehe. So tell me. What exactly is going on?

Flandre

Apparently, Chen forgot what you asked her to do. She came to us for help.

Yukari

Oh, so you wanted Satori to read my mind? It's a little inelegant, but it probably would've worked.

Okina

Argh!

Satori

I'm sorry we tried to trick you. But Chen said she didn't want to disappoint you―

Yukari

I already know that. She's my adorable Chen, after all. And that's exactly why I'm going to help you.

Flandre

What was that about Yukari getting mad?

Okina

I told you not to give me that look!

Yukari

But giving you what you want would be boring. Let's settle this with a battle of bullets.

Okina

Bring it on!

Yukari

Hehe. If you win, I'll tell you what I asked her to buy. You've probably figured it out by now―

Yukari

―But don't think you'll be able to get it out of me that easily.

Satori

*sigh* I should've known this would happen.

Yukari

Sorry, I'm a little irritated about not getting my dango. You'll have to let me take it out on you!

Satori

W-We couldn't beat her! She's so strong!

Okina

Yes, but it was most enjoyable.

Yukari

I agree, it was a wonderful battle.

Yukari

Dango, tea leaves, and soy sauce. That's what I asked Chen to get. Now don't go forgetting like she did.

Flandre

Huh? I thought we had to win to get the list...

Okina

Tch. Now we owe her a favor, is that it?

Satori

Come on, we're doing this for Chen. I'm sure that's why she told us.

Okina

Gah! I can't stand that Yukari! Let's head back and get this over with!

Flandre

Hehe, you're kinda cute when you're angry!

Okina

A-Are you even listening to me?! Hurry up and hop through the door!

Sanae

Welcome back! Nice timing, by the way. We just got a large delivery of cold drinks.

Sanae

It must've been hot outside. Miss Seiga said you're welcome to have some.

Flandre

Shiri-Cola! Gimme some!

Satori

This is the same thing you were drinking earlier, right? Come to think of it, even Koishi is quite fond of it.

Okina

I heard it's made by the kappa. Is it really that good?

Sanae

The taste is hard to describe, but it's sweet, fizzy, and refreshing. One sip, and you'll be hooked.

Sanae

OK, I gotta get back to the stage now!

Sanae

You guys haven't been able to take a proper break yet, have you? Resting is a part of the job, so make sure you get some!

Satori

The club is packed. I'm glad to see it's doing so well after the reopening.

Okina

Let's toast to that with a bottle of Shiri-Cola!

Satori

I guess it'd be nice to try something different for a change. Huh...?

Okina

What's wrong with this thing? It won't open.

Flandre

Arrrrrrgh! Nope, it won't budge. If I try any harder, I'll just end up breaking the bottle!

Satori

Maybe there's a trick to opening it?

Nitori

Heeey! Sorry for barging in!

Nitori

Did you guys already serve the drinks that came earlier?

Okina

You mean the Shiri-Cola?

Nitori

Yeah! The thing is... we noticed a manufacturing error after we dropped them off.

Flandre

Is that why we can't get them open?

Nitori

Yeah! The lids got welded on by mistake.

Satori

So this whole batch is defective? All of it?

Nitori

I'm really sorry. *sigh* We'll have to make new ones.

Junko

Apologies for eavesdropping, but that's very interesting.

Okina

Weren't you in the middle of serving some customers?

Junko

Don't worry. All of them fainted and are probably having nightmares right now.

Flandre

Huh? What did you do?

Junko

My job. I tell ghost stories to the customers.

Flandre

That sounds more interesting than Shiri-Cola. What story did you tell them?

Okina

I think you have your priorities mixed up. Tell her, Satori―

Satori

...!

Okina

You too?! You were reading her mind, weren't you?!

Satori

Huh?!

Junko

I'll tell you the story later if you want. Let's get back to the Shiri-Cola problem for now.

Junko

That's one of our bestselling drinks. We'll be in trouble without it.

Nitori

I know, but we'll need time to make more. Let me take these back first. We'll see if we can get the lids loose...

Junko

What exactly is the problem? We just need to get the bottles open, right?

Okina

I hope you're not going to do what I think you're going to do.

Junko

We can use bullets to blow off the lids! Just like... this!

Junko

...

Okina

Congrats. You shattered the bottle. I guess you could say you purified it and sent it back to nothingness...

Junko

Heh. This just proves I'm too powerful.

Satori

Maybe our only option is to break the bottles to get the Shiri-Cola out.

Nitori

But if we do that, glass shards might slip into the drink. Isn't that a bit dangerous?

Satori

Th-That's true...

Nitori

Gaaaah! The kappa's reputation is ruined! What should I do?!

Okina

You could ask us to take care of it.

Nitori

What? You'd do that?

Okina

Why wouldn't we? We've been solving all sorts of problems. We can take care of this in seconds.

Nitori

Th-That's great! Please protect the kappa's honor and save the Shiri-Cola!

Okina

OK. You're up, Flandre!

Flandre

Huh?

Satori

Oh, why didn't I think of that?

Okina

What are you so confused about? Use your powers to destroy the lid. Just be gentle about it.

Okina

And you, Satori... you sure are blind for someone who has the ability to see through people.

Satori

Ouch. I guess you're right though...

Flandre

But... that'll require a lot of control!

Okina

Don't worry, you can do it! That's why I chose you for the team! Just destroy it an eensy-weensy bit.

Flandre

This is gonna be tricky... Here I go!

Nitori

That was amazing! She destroyed the lid! The Shiri-Cola is saved!

Flandre

Whoa! I can't believe that worked! I was so sure it'd fail...

Okina

I told you, didn't I?! All the fragments that broke off were blown away, so it's safe to drink!

Okina

Looks like all that practice using your powers to solve problems is paying off!

Satori

You're acting as though you made this happen yourself. But, I get why you're so happy.

Flandre

Oh... Hehehe! I've come a long way, huh?

I guess this counts as a problem solved!

You saved the day! Thanks, Flan!

Nitori

You can say that again! Thank you on behalf of all the kappa!

Flandre

Hehehe, you're welcome! Now me and all the customers can have a nice cold Shiri-Cola!

Flandre

Wait... do you guys expect me to destroy the lids of ALL the other bottles?!

Mokou

*sigh* I just don't get it.

Okina

Hey, what's going on? Why do I sense so much gloom coming from over there?

Keine

Hm? Are you talking about Mokou? I invited her to come see our reopening.

Okina

What? No, that's not what I'm asking!

Keine

Well... I got that, but I think we should leave her be.

Satori

How long has she been like that?

Keine

Since she got here a few hours ago.

Flandre

Whaaat? You mean you've been ignoring her the whole time?

Keine

What do you take me for?! As soon as she sat down, I asked her what was wrong!

Keine

But she kept dodging my questions... She probably doesn't want to talk about it.

Keine

I'm her friend, but I can't do a thing to help... Or maybe she just doesn't want to confide in me.

Okina

Stop jumping to conclusions. She's probably not telling you BECAUSE you're such a close friend.

Keine

O-Oh... I guess.

Satori

We'll go talk to her. We might be able to help.

Keine

Thanks. Do whatever you can for her.

Okina

First, we need to plan how to go about this. I don't think she'll give us an honest answer if we ask her directly.

Okina

Even on the off-chance that she doesn't know about Satori's powers, reading her mind without consent wouldn't be right.

Satori

Yes, and that wouldn't do the club's reputation any favors either―

Flandre

Heeeey! Why do you look so annoyed? Something bothering you? We can help!

Mokou

Huh...?

Okina & Satori

Wha―?!

Maybe Flan's childlike innocence will get her to open up.

Wow, zero hesitation! You go, Flan!

Mokou

Huh? Did Keine send you guys? Go tell her there's nothing wrong with me.

Okina

...A-Allow me to apologize for Flandre's bluntness.

Satori

We're the Consultation Crew. We help Old Desire's customers with their problems.

Mokou

Oh... So you're the ones everyone's been talking about.

Mokou

I don't need your help. I'm not one of those people who lets their worries get the better of them.

Mokou

You better not try to read my mind. That would actually put me in a bad mood.

Satori

Don't worry, I won't.

Flandre

Are you sure you're not upset? We can solve any problem, you know?! And we're fully confidential!

Mokou

G-Go away... I already told you there's nothing wrong!

Flandre

Reaaaally?

Mokou

Yeah, really!

Flandre

Really, reaaaally?

Mokou

Yeah! Really, really!

Flandre

Really...?

Mokou

You're scaring me!

Mokou

Fine! I'll tell you! It's not that big of a deal anyway!

Flandre

Aha! I knew it!

Okina

Guess that's one way of doing things... Better remember that for later.

Satori

I don't know. People might just say yes out of fear.

Mokou

Anyway, like I was saying, it's not a big problem. Thanks for the concern, but I don't need your help.

Mokou

I'm sure I'll forget about it over a couple of Shiri-Colas. It's just a matter of time!

Okina

This is getting nowhere. Her stubbornness is starting to irritate me.

Satori

...I don't want to admit it, but same here.

Okina

OK, enough of this charade! Satori, tell us everything! Spill the beans! You have my permission!

Mokou

What?! You can't do that!

Satori

All right! So apparently―

Mokou

What's the meaning of this?! Why have you dragged me out here?!

Okina

To solve your problem, of course.

Mokou

I already told you I don't want your help! You better stop, or else―

Okina

"I wonder what's up with Kaguya these days."

Mokou

Huh?!

Okina

"It's been a while since we had a battle of bullets. I'm kinda worried..."

Mokou

S-S-S-Stop!

Okina

"I could ask Keine, but that's embarrassing. What should I do...?"

Mokou

Fine! Fineeeeeeee! I'll talk! Please don't say any more!

Okina

Great. I'll take that as a request for help. We can finally go all out now!

Satori

Flandre's already on the move. I'm glad her efforts won't go to waste.

Mokou

What do you mean, she's on the move?! Where's she moving to?!

Satori

I asked her to do something that'll allow us to solve your problem. It's an easy task. She should be done soon.

Okina

Let's just wait here for now.

Mokou

What's going on?!

Okina

OK, I'll explain―

Okina

―Actually, it looks like that won't be necessary.

Flandre

C'mon! It's this way!

Kaguya

I heard Mokou fell into one of Tewi's traps! I can't miss an opportunity to laugh in her face!

Kaguya

I can't believe she'd be so stupid! I'm gonna laugh till my lungs give out!

Mokou

What's Kaguya doing here? Did Flandre bring her?

Mokou

And what's this ridiculous story she's made up?!

Okina

It looks like the plan worked. Now, on to the next step...

Satori

Just don't overdo it...

Okina

Don't worry, I won't.

Kaguya

O-OUCH! Who attacked me from behind?!

Satori

It was Miss Mokou.

Mokou

HUH?!

Kaguya

Mokou?! I heard you fell for Tewi's trap! Wait, tell me why you attacked me first!

Mokou

H-Hold up! I don't know what's going on either!

Okina

OK, this should do it―

Kaguya

Oh, I get it...

Consultation Crew

Huh?

Kaguya

Mokou and I have had countless battles of bullets over the years, you know? She'd never resort to a dirty trick like that.

Mokou

Kaguya...!

Kaguya

I don't know what's happening here, but I think I know who's behind it.

Kaguya

We should teach these scoundrels a lesson. What do you say, Mokou?

Mokou

Huh? Y-Yeah! I finally get it! Let's do this!

Kaguya

It's been a while since we had a battle. I hope you've still got it. This isn't gonna be an easy fight.

Mokou

Who do you think you're talking to?! You just worry about not getting in my way!

Flandre

Huh? Was this part of your plan, Okina?

Okina

N-Not exactly!

Kaguya

Hey, you. Little bunny. I can see you enjoying the show. You clearly have nothing better to do, so join us.

Tewi

EEEEEEEEP! O-OK... I'll do my best!

Mokou

Gah... She's too strong! She might be rotten on the inside, but she's still a god!

Okina

Who are you calling rotten?!

Tewi

Wh-Why was I dragged into this?!

Kaguya

Tewi, go get everyone from Eientei. Right now. And don't you dare think about running away.

Tewi

O-OK!

Tewi

I-I brought everyone!

Eirin

What's going on, Kaguya? I'm already exhausted from the all-nighters I've been pulling lately...

Reisen

Oh, the Consultation Crew is here! Thanks for earlier!

Kaguya

No time to explain. Just shut up and help!

Eirin

B-But they helped Reisen...

Reisen

Y-Yeah! How can I bite the hand that fed me―

Kaguya

What's that? Are you refusing me?

Reisen

C-Consultation Crew... g-get ready for a fight!

Eirin

*sigh* I knew this would happen...

Satori

She actually brought reinforcements... This is a pain.

Kaguya

Yes, we're sore losers. Sorry, but you're going to have to deal with it.

Mokou

It's time for round two!

Kaguya

We lost again? Mokou, are you sure you haven't gone soft?

Mokou

Look who's talking! I'll show you who's gone soft after we regain our strength!

Flandre

I don't know what's going on, but they seem to be enjoying themselves.

Satori

It didn't exactly go to plan, but like they say, all's well that ends well.

Futo

I've said it a million times, and I'll say it again! There's none better than Lady Taishi in this whole world!

Futo

Not only is she virtuous, but she also guides those who hath lost their way... She's the epitome of nobility!

Okina

...

Tojiko

But! Because she prioritizes her noble mission, she sometimes neglects her health!

Tojiko

Lately, she's been so engrossed with her work that some days she forgets to eat!

Flandre

...

Futo

Her actions are truly wondrous... But! When that continues for nights on end, I can't help but worry!

Tojiko

I've thought about telling her to take care of herself, but seeing her work so diligently, I just can't bring myself to do it!

Satori

That... doesn't sound good.

Tojiko & Futo

Consultation Crew―

Tojiko & Futo

We need your help!

Okina

Sorry, but what exactly is it you want us to do?

Tojiko

What?! Did you not hear anything we said?!

Flandre

You kept going on and on... I stopped listening.

Futo

You stopped listening?! We were discussing Lady Taishi's magnificence!

Satori

*sigh* Fine, I'll just―

Tojiko & Futo

No, stop!

Futo

Our problem is about Lady Taishi. Of course we had to talk about her. And we couldn't risk insulting her name.

Futo

If only there was a more concise way to introduce her...

Tojiko

Agreed. But if we don't get a move on, these guys will never accept our request.

Satori

You want us to get her to rest, right?

Tojiko & Futo

What?!

Okina

Is that all? Don't worry, we'll get it done. You can count on us.

Flandre

Finally! How long has it been since they got here?

Long enough to make me lose track of time...

Zzz... I-I'm awake! I'm awake!

Futo

H-How dare you presume to understand Lady Taishi's hardship!

Tojiko

Urk! Let's go, Futo! It was our fault for thinking we could rely on other people!

Satori

Wait.

Tojiko & Futo

What now?!

Satori

I completely understand your passion and your concern for your master.

Satori

We accept your request. Rest assured, we'll solve your problem.

Futo

A second ago, thou weren't even listening to us. Now thou wishest to help?!

Tojiko

You can't fool us! You just think it'll have a negative effect on your reputation if you don't solve our problem!

Satori

No one's trying to fool you. I've been listening to your concerns the whole time. Or rather, reading them.

Satori

I ask you to have faith in us.

Futo

Tojiko...

Tojiko

OK.

Tojiko & Futo

Please help us!

Satori

We will.

Okina

You sure know how to win people over. No wonder you're the Mistress of the Palace of the Earth Spirits.

Satori

I'm honored.

Flandre

So how are we going to fix this?

Okina

Toyosatomimi no Miko is quite wise. I'm sure she'll understand if we explain the importance of rest.

Seiga

I wonder if they're OK.

Yoshika

What's with the look? Are you worried about the Consultation Crew?

Seiga

Yes, a little bit. It's good to be enthusiastic, but...

Seiga

I feel like they're forgetting something important.

Miko

Thanks for your concern, but I don't need to rest.

Miko

Or rather, I don't have time to. I have my mission to take care of.

Flandre

Okina! I thought you said it'd work!

Okina

Ugh, but why?! You, of all people, should understand how dangerous it is to push yourself too hard!

Satori

And we're not the only ones worried about you. Can you at least try to understand how they feel?

Miko

Everything you say is true. And I appreciate Tojiko and Futo's concern.

Miko

But... there are countless people who need guidance. Helping them is much more important than my well-being!

Miko

I've been feeling great these past few days. Maybe I'm not at my best, but I don't plan on taking a break!

Flandre

My bullet battle senses are tingling. Hehehe!

Okina

It looks like she's already past her limit. Soon it'll be too late to help her. We have no other option.

Satori

I don't think anything we say is going to persuade her. Oh, well...

So the plan is to put her to sleep?

Miss Miko, run!

Okina

I'd hate to keep her up longer than necessary. Let's make this battle short.

Miko

But... my... mission...

Miko

Zzz... *snore*... Zzz.

Satori

She has such a peaceful sleeping face... It looks like the plan worked.

Okina

She must've been exhausted. I don't think she'll be waking up anytime soon, and when she does, she'll be well rested.

Flandre

Problem solved!

Okina

The Consultation Crew is doing so well. We've solved so many problems already.

Satori

It's been an exhausting day, but I'm glad we haven't failed any of our clients.

Flandre

It doesn't look like there's anyone else waiting to see us. Does that mean we're done?

Okina

With the problem-solving, yes. But we still need to serve drinks and tidy up. We should talk to Seiga.

Satori

And we may still get more requests. Let's stay focused till closing time.

Iku

Hello...

Yoshika

Welcome! Are you here by yourself?

Iku

Yes. It's just me.

Yoshika

OK. This way, please. Relax and enjoy your stay!

Iku

Thanks. I'm looking forward to the battle of bullets show everyone's been talking about.

Okina

Well, this is a surprise. What's the messenger of the Dragon Palace doing all the way out here?

Iku

Huh? Wh-Why are you here?!

Okina

The club owner asked me to set up a consultation corner. This here is my crew.

Satori

Hi, I'm Satori Komeiji. I'm the first point of contact for all our clients. It's nice to meet you.

Flandre

I'm Flandre! I destroy―I mean, solve all kinds of problems! Hope you enjoy your stay!

I'm PLAYER. I'm here to assist the team.

Um, I'm the one who keeps Flan in check...

Iku

I didn't know there was a service like that. It's quite reassuring.

Okina

If you wanted a consultation, we could do it right away. Let's get you a drink first, though.

Iku

Hehe, all right. I suppose it'd be nice to talk. And I'd like a Shiri-Cola, please.

Iku

―So anyway, it's crazy, right?

Okina

S-Sure...

Iku

Oh, by the way, this Shiri-Cola is delicious! I feel so refreshed! Can I have another?

Satori

O-Of course. I'll get it right away.

Iku

*glug* *glug*... Mmh! OK, back to my story.

Flandre

Yeah...

Iku

I don't just work for the Eldest Daughter!

Iku

I think we've spent too much time together... She can be so insolent. Not to mention, selfish!

Iku

She treats me like a nobody! Boy, I'd sure love to reject some of her orders!

Iku

I wonder what I am to her... What do you think?!

Okina

Huh?! U-Um... Why don't you finish your story first? I'll tell you what I think at the end.

Sanae

It's like watching one of those reality TV shows about abusive bosses...

If you were listening, come and help us out!

Miss Sanae, don't tell me you're enjoying this!

Iku

I figured there was no point wallowing and decided to come here to make myself feel better.

Iku

The drinks are delicious, and the show was wonderful, but I don't think I feel up to going back yet.

Iku

Maybe I'd feel better if I knew what the Eldest Daughter thinks of me...

Flandre

I-Is story time over?

Satori

I think so.

Okina

She told us everything without you having to read her mind... And this one actually sounds like a genuine problem.

Satori

We're accepting this request, right?

Flandre

Yeah, we have to help her!

Iku

That'd be great, but are you sure...? I mean, this is my problem, after all.

Okina

It's commendable that you want to solve your own problems, but sometimes it's important to let others help you.

Iku

I guess... OK, please help me.

Satori

The whole purpose of Old Desire is to provide peace of mind, and the Consultation Crew is no different.

Satori

You can count on us.

Tenshi

Nope. No way. Nuh-uh. I've got no obligation to talk to you about it.

Tenshi

You show up out of the blue and expect me to tell you what I think of Iku! Are you out of your minds?

Flandre

Ahaha... hahaha...!

Satori

Th-This is bad! We're here for Miss Iku. Please, calm down! Miss Okina, make her stop!

Okina

Grrrrrrrr!

Satori

Not you, too!

I-It's time for me to do my job!

No one told me I had to control Flan AND Miss Okina!

Tenshi

Really, PLAYER? Time is precious, and you're wasting yours with them?

Satori

We believe what we're doing is useful. You're the one wasting time by arguing.

Tenshi

What did you say?!

Satori

Do you seriously think you can hide things from a satori youkai? I can read your mind whether you like it or not!

Tenshi

Is that a threat? How dare you even think about reading my mind!

Tenshi

But if you really want to know, I'll answer your question. I have no problems with Iku. I'm satisfied with our relationship.

Tenshi

I don't know what's upsetting her, but it's not my fault. I'm sure she'll be back to her usual self soon.

Tenshi

That's all I have to say. You got what you wanted, now get lost.

Okina

Just because we're being nice doesn't mean you can disrespect us like that!

Flandre

Okina... do I have the green light?

Tenshi

You wanna fight? Fine by me. At least that won't be a TOTAL waste of my time!

Okina

Bring it on! We'll fix that hubris of yours with our bullets!

Satori

Ugh!

Okina

AHAHAHAHAHA! This isn't over!

Tenshi

HAH! That's my line! I'm not gonna let you go till I've made you beg for forgiveness!

Flandre

KEHEHEHEHE!

Satori

Th-This is getting out of hand! Let's retreat to Old Desire!

Miss Okina, Flan, please stop! We need to fall back!

I'm not afraid! I can stop them!

Okina

What are you doing?! Let go of me! I going to beat the living heaven out of her!

Flandre

Arrrrgh! Grrrrrr! You haven't heard the last of us!

Satori

Have you calmed down?

Okina

Yes... But why did you have to get in the way? I would've put an end to that stuck-up celestial once and for all!

Satori

And what would you achieve by doing that? The only thing we're supposed to put an end to is our clients' problems.

Okina

I know that! But...

Flandre

I'm sorry. We even dragged PLAYER into it...

Don't worry, I'm fine. And I'm glad you all are too.

This time, I gave it my all to stop you!

Satori

...Now everyone's calmed down, let's recap what we know.

Satori

I couldn't get a complete read, but what she said was mostly true.

Satori

Feelings are expressed through actions, and based on hers, it seems she's happy with her and Miss Iku's relationship.

Okina

What a fool... She really is selfish!

Flandre

We can't tell Iku this, can we? What do we do...?

Satori

I don't think it's going to be easy to persuade Miss Tenshi to do anything, either.

Okina

Especially not after the way she reacted the first time. She'll be even more cautious now.

Satori

It's almost closing time. We need to do something quick.

Flandre

Urk... I'm not good with time limits! I get all panicky and lose focus!

Okina

We can't just sit here and whine. We need to think of something!

Seiga

Thank you. We look forward to seeing you again.

Yoshika

They looked so content.

Seiga

So did all of today's customers.

Seiga

Except for that one in the corner...

Consultation Crew

...

Iku

U-Um...

Okina

Sorry! We couldn't be of any help to you!

Satori

We tried our best to solve your problem, but we don't have a clear answer for you.

Flandre

*sob* *sniff* Sorry.

Iku

I-It's OK! I already told you this is my problem. I need to deal with it on my own.

Iku

I'm grateful you tried to help. That's more than enough for me...

Flandre

But!

Iku

If the Eldest Daughter says she's happy with the way things are, then that's fine.

Iku

Knowing that is good enough.

Satori

Miss Iku... Do you really mean that?

Iku

Of course, I do. Anyway, it's closing time. I better get going.

Okina

W-Wait! We can't just let you go like that―

Tenshi

―I finally found you, Iku. So this is where you were.

Iku

Eldest Daughter?!

Flandre

H-How did you find out about this place?!

Tenshi

How stupid can you be? You guys said you were going back to Old Desire when you ran off.

Okina

Did you come all the way here just to say that? Or are you here to pick up where we left off?

Tenshi

I think you've misunderstood. I wouldn't waste time with something so stupid.

Iku

Th-Then why are you here?

Tenshi

Don't tell me I need to spell it out for you!

Tenshi

To take you back! You've had enough time to relax. Now it's time to go home.

Iku

You came to get me yourself?

Okina

How can you be so selfish?! We're not handing her over until you fix that attitude of yours!

Flandre

Yeah!

Satori

...

Tenshi

Stay out of this! This is between Iku and me!

Okina

Gosh! You're such an idiot! I'm going to beat some sense into you!

Tenshi

Argh! I told you I'm not here to fight!

Flandre

Why? What happened to all that smack talk from earlier?! It's about time we taught you a lesson!

Okina

Very good, Flandre! Shatter her ego with your destruction skills!

Flandre

Time for the final blow!

Tenshi

Tch!

Iku

Enough!

Flandre

Huh?!

Iku

I'm really glad to see you all so worked up for me. But I don't want to see the Eldest Daughter hurt.

Tenshi

Iku...

Iku

Are you OK? They're quite understanding people. You could've just talked it out.

Tenshi

Hmph! This is all your fault. I don't know what you expected, but I don't plan on apologizing.

Okina

Are you seriously still keeping up that act?!

Tenshi

You're the only one who accepts me for who I am. That's why you need to stay by my side.

Iku

...!

Tenshi

You can come talk to me if something's bothering you. I'll listen.

Iku

Eldest Daughter...

Iku

*sigh* Geez.

Iku

Even after everything, you still don't think you did anything wrong. You really are a pain in the neck.

Tenshi

That's what makes me me.

Iku

True...

Iku

But you still care about me, don't you? You came all the way here to take me back.

Iku

Pfft. You really need me, huh?

Tenshi

It's the complete opposite! You're the one who needs me!

Iku

Hehehe. If you say so!

Tenshi

Hmph. Whatever!

Consultation Crew

Huh...?

Iku

Thank you for everything. I'm going back to Heaven with the Eldest Daughter.

Tenshi

Don't think I've forgotten about before. I'll get my own back, just you wait!

Iku

Thanks to you, I learned a little more about what the Eldest Daughter's really like...

Iku

And what I mean to her. I owe you one.

Consultation Crew

P-Problem solved...?

Consultation Crew

...

Seiga

Great work today, everyone. The last case, in particular, was very well handled!

Okina

Are you being sarcastic? We weren't able to do anything for Iku.

Seiga

That's not true. You did exactly what had to be done.

Flandre

But... after we heard her story, we went out to solve her problem and we failed.

Satori

Hm, I wonder if Miss Iku would agree.

Seiga

I don't know how she came to terms with the whole situation in the end, but one thing is certain...

Seiga

Your actions made a big difference.

Satori

I still don't see how what we did helped her...

Seiga

Hmm.

Seiga

Let me give you an example to make it clear, as well as highlight some areas you can improve on.

Okina

Areas we can improve on?

Seiga

Yes. I watched you all day, and there are some things I noticed.

Seiga

You've been solving people's problems, but you've been ignoring their root causes.

Flandre

Aren't they the same thing?

Seiga

Not at all.

Seiga

It's like the old expression, "Give someone a fish, and they'll eat for a day."

Seiga

"But teach them to fish, and they'll never go hungry again."

Okina

You mean by solving people's problems, we've only been giving them fish?

Seiga

Precisely.

Seiga

Giving a hungry person a fish certainly helps, but it doesn't do much for them in the long run.

Seiga

You need to realize that you've been providing clients with quick fixes.

Satori

You're right...

Satori

Like with Miss Shinmyoumaru, instead of simply finding the lost item for her―

Satori

―we should've taught her how to avoid losing things.

Flandre

And instead of just stopping two people fighting, we gotta make sure they get back on good terms... right?

Seiga

Exactly.

Seiga

If you don't address the issue that caused the fight, another one is bound to occur.

Okina

That's exactly what happened with Tenshi...

Satori

Forcing Miss Tenshi to apologize would've only been a temporary fix. Miss Iku's concerns would've come back.

Flandre

Then why was she so happy?

Seiga

Because even though it wasn't intentional, you all made a difference.

Seiga

Your earnest appeals to Miss Tenshi are what got her to take a good look at how she actually felt.

Seiga

She realized that she actually cares about Miss Iku.

Seiga

That's why she came all the way here―to prove it. She was rather unpleasant about it, but one step at a time.

Flandre

If she cares so much, why can't she just say so?!

Seiga

That's the way she is.

Seiga

After Miss Iku saw Miss Tenshi had come to get her, she had a change of heart.

Seiga

You're all strong opponents, but she faced you alone.

Okina

Her grand gesture had a bigger impact than words could have. It let Miss Iku see things clearly.

Seiga

You could see on her face that her problem was solved. That's why she thanked you before leaving.

Flandre

Awesome! So, we actually did a good job!

Okina

And there I was thinking we'd messed up...

Satori

Thank you, Miss Seiga. I feel much better now.

Seiga

It's not like me to lecture people. I feel all embarrassed.

Yoshika

Seiga's acting kinda cool today! I gotta get everyone here so they can see it for themselves!

Seiga

Y-Yoshika?! Wait! There's no need for that! The longer it goes on, the less cool I'll seem!

Satori

...They can be so weird.

Okina

I'm glad Seiga told us all that, but it's got me thinking.

Okina

Were we solving our clients' problems to help them, or to make ourselves feel good?

Satori

I think I relied too much on my ability. I thought if I read their minds, I'd understand everything...

Satori

I was so caught up in solving problems that I completely overlooked the underlying causes.

Okina

I also regret the way I handled things. I wanted to solve as many problems as possible to make Gensokyo a better place.

Okina

I prioritized logic and efficiency... but ended up neglecting the real issues.

Flandre

I did the same... Remilia and the others are always by my side―

Flandre

―so I took it for granted that everyone has someone to support them.

Flandre

I should've realized that, for our clients, I needed to be that someone.

Satori

Sounds like we all still have a lot to learn.

But realizing that is a big step!

Now you know what to do.

Okina

Hehe... That's right.

Satori

Going forward, we'll teach all our clients to fish! And for that―

Flandre

―we've gotta work together! I'm sure we can do it!

Flandre

After all, we're the Consultation Crew!

Sanae

Welcome! Seat for one? Sure! I'll take you through our options!

Sanae

Would you like something to eat? Or are you here for our battle of bullets show? Orrrr how about a ghost story?

Keine

You're just confusing them with so many options. The best thing to do is to give them your recommendation.

Keine

I recommend you have a delicious meal. We've recently started working with restaurants from all over Gensokyo.

Keine

We have Mystia's grilled lamprey, Mokou's special grilled chicken, and a variety of dishes from Nemuno.

Letty

Don't forget to recommend desserts. We have my homemade ice cream and the moon rabbits' special dango.

Letty

It's quite hot today. How about you cool off with some ice cream and a battle of bullets show?

Junko

Cooling off with a snowy bullet show doesn't sound bad, but that wouldn't be enough, now would it?

Junko

You need something that'll send shivers down your spine, and my ghost stories will do just that.

Sanae

Hey, quit butting in, and let me do my job!

Yoshika

Wow! Everyone's so enthusiastic!

Seiga

Hehe, they probably don't want to get left behind by the newbies.

Yoshika

Yeah, the Consultation Crew has been doing great!

Marisa

You see, the fairies have come back. So it'd be great if you guys can get rid of them again.

Okina

OK, but before that, we'll teach you how to keep things organized.

Marisa

Eek! Why?! I just want you to get rid of the fairies and tidy up―

Okina

Sure, we could do that in a flash, but it won't fix the problem. You'll end up back here in no time.

Okina

Don't worry. I won't give up on you no matter how long it takes for you to learn.

Marisa

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Okina

HA HA HA! You can't hide from my network of back doors!

Yuugi

So you're saying it happened 'cause I'm hot-headed? OK, I'll be more careful next time.

Satori

I can read your mind, so I know you feel bad about it. But you can't control accidents.

Yuugi

...So what can I do?

Satori

First, you need to be more aware of your own strength. That'll help you control it.

Yuugi

I see...

Satori

I have some silken tofu here, and it's extra soft.

Yuugi

Huh...?

Satori

Carry it around for a day without letting it crumble. And don't come back to the surface till you succeed.

Yuugi

HUUUUUUUUH?!

Miko

Thanks for the other day. I'm well rested now.

Miko

I also realized how worried I was making those around me.

Tojiko & Futo

Lady Taishi...!

Miko

And that's exactly why I'm going to dedicate myself to them!

Tojiko & Futo

What?!

Flandre

Ugh, not this again!

Flandre

To make others happy, first, you need to make yourself happy! It doesn't work otherwise!

Flandre

If someone's not happy, no one's happy. But if everyone's happy... then everyone's happy!

Miko

I can't believe I'm repeating the same mistake...

Flandre

You need to work together with Futo and Tojiko. And if something goes wrong...

Flandre

I'll set things straight. Hehehe!

Seiga

There's still room for improvement, but they're doing a good job. As the club owner, I'll keep an eye on them.

Everyone's come together to make a great team!

I better make sure not to get left behind!

Seiga

There you go being humble again. You're doing a wonderful job yourself.

Yoshika

It's a shame you're only a human. Wanna turn into a jiang shi?

Seiga

Oh, that's a great idea! I'd love to make a jiang shi out of PLAYER!

Sorry, but I'm happy being a human for now.

I-Is jiang shi my only option?

Seiga

We'll have to put this conversation on hold. We have a new customer!

Yoshika

Gotta greet them with a smile!

Seiga

Yes, very good, Yoshika! It's all about providing comfort and peace of mind.

Old Desire

Welcome―

Consultation Crew

―To Old Desire!

Flandre

Another day of solving a whole lot of problems! The Consultation Crew is doing really well!

Okina

Requests keep pouring in. We've become quite popular.

Satori

That's true...

Flandre

C'mon! We've rested long enough. Let's get back to work!

Wow, Flan. That's some enthusiasm.

That's the spirit! Just don't overexert yourself, OK?

Okina

It's good to be enthusiastic, but you have to know your limits.

Okina

We'll be no good to our clients if we burn ourselves out, so let us know if you ever need a break.

Satori

Um... about that...

Okina

Although, maybe I don't need to worry. I'm sure Satori will notice if anyone's getting tired.

Flandre

But what if she's the one feeling tired?

Satori

U-Um... ah...

Okina

Huh?! H-Hey, Satori!

Flandre

I-I jinxed it, didn't I?!

Okina

There's no such thing as jinxing! Satori, are you all right?!

Satori

*huff* *huff* I-I'm OK. J-Just a little sleepy... and dizzy...

Okina

Gah! How did I not notice?! Let's get you to a doctor!

Satori

No... All I need is some rest, and I'll be fine.

Flandre

But you look so pale... just like Remilia when Sakuya forces her to eat veggies.

Satori

Really, I'm fine. Besides... if I leave now, what'll happen to the Consultation Crew?

Okina

You're our most vital member! We have to prioritize your recovery!

Sanae

Hey! Everyone in the club can hear you, you know?! What on earth is going on here―?

Sanae

Huuuuuh?! Miss Satori, are you OK?!

Okina

Nice timing, Sanae!

Okina

I'm going to Eientei to fetch the doctor. Look after Satori and Flan while I'm gone!

Sanae

G-Got it!

Flandre

Hang in there, Satori! A doctor will be here soon!

Satori

S-Sorry, everyone...

Eirin

OK, I'm done examining her.

Flandre

What happened?! Is she better now?!

Okina

Calm down, Flandre. Tell us, doctor, how's Satori?

Eirin

It's nothing serious. She's probably overworked.

Flandre

Ph-Phew!

Eirin

It's not all good news, though. Sanae told me how hard you've all been working. You need to take it easy.

Eirin

You've solved dozens of problems in just a few days.

Eirin

And on top of that, Satori's been using her mind reading ability non-stop. It's no wonder she collapsed.

Okina

Maybe we were relying on her ability too much...

Flandre

...So it's our fault this happened!

Eirin

I've put her to sleep. For now, you need to let her rest. Is that clear?

Okina

Crystal.

Okina

Flandre, PLAYER. Looks like it's going to be just the three of us for a while.

Okina

I hope you're ready.

Eirin

Are you out of your mind? Surely you're all exhausted!

Eirin

Who knows when the next one of you will collapse?! You need to rest!

Okina

You're probably right, but we can't afford to do that.

Flandre

Satori would want us to keep going.

Eirin

Wh-What?!

Okina

She kept pushing herself despite being completely exhausted.

Okina

And she did it for our clients. As her team members, it's our responsibility to do all we can.

Flandre

Yeah! We can always take a break after Satori gets better!

We know it's reckless, but we need to do this!

After all, we're the Consultation Crew!

Eirin

Not you, too, PLAYER... *sigh* Fine. But don't say I didn't warn you.

Okina

We won't! Thank you for helping Satori!

Sanae

I heard you guys are going to keep working even without Miss Satori.

Okina

It'll be tough without her, but we can't quit just because we're one member down!

Flandre

Yeah! We'll prove we can handle this by ourselves!

Okina

We don't need to read minds to solve problems. We just have to pay attention to our clients and understand their needs.

Sanae

Whoa, that's some confidence! Way to go, Consultation Crew!

???

Um, sorry to butt in, but...

???

Can we have a consultation?

Okina

And look, we have a client already.

Okina

Come on, we have a reputation to keep! Let's give it our best until Satori gets back!

Flandre

YEAH!

Okina

Hello, we're the Consultation Crew. What can we do for you?

Flandre

Got a problem? We'll solve it in a flash! C'mon, don't be shy. Tell us what's on your mind!

Eika

You're the ones everyone's talking about, right?!

Eika

But I heard there were four of you...

Okina

There are, but one of us had to take some time off.

Urumi

Oh... We can come back later if this is a bad time. We don't want to be a bother.

Flandre

How thoughtful! But don't worry about it! Or are you not happy with only the three of us?

Urumi

I-It's not that!

Eika

We were just a little concerned about whether you'd be able to help... I mean, it's a pretty serious problem.

Letty

You don't need to worry about that. Everyone here can vouch for this team's effectiveness.

Okina

Hehe... Thanks for the support!

Letty

But you still need to work on your hospitality. You haven't even offered these two a drink yet.

Flandre

Oh, right!

Letty

For now, I brought them some chilled ramune soda. Here you go, ladies. On the house.

Urumi

Wow, thanks! I was kinda thirsty. It's so hot today.

Eika

Thanks! *glug* *glug* Phew! It's so fizzy and delicious!

Letty

Just ask these two if you'd like another.

Flandre

Grr! She swooped in and did our job for us!

Okina

Gah! Satori wouldn't have let that happen!

Flandre

We gotta do more to make up for her not being here!

Okina

We better, or our reputation will pay the price!

Okina

Let's hear them out for now. We don't have our mind-reader, so we need to pay extra attention.

Flandre

Got it! I'm gonna listen suuuuper closely!

We should use what we've learned so far!

This is making me appreciate Satori even more...

Urumi

Everyone here thinks they can help us, so maybe we should try talking to them.

Eika

Yeah, I'm sure they'll come through for us.

Okina

Great! So tell us―what's been bothering you?

Eika

It's about Komachi, the Sanzu River's shinigami.

Flandre

Ew! I hate flowing water, especially rivers. And the Sanzu River is, like, the WORST river!

Okina

I don't think anyone is particularly fond of it...

Eika

But the Sanzu River is an awesome place with all the best spots for stacking stones!

Okina

S-Sorry. I didn't mean to offend you..

Urumi

Hahaha! Don't sweat it. What you said is basically true.

Urumi

But since we both live there, we often bump into Komachi.

Urumi

And, lately... she's been slacking off even more than usual.

Urumi

The other day we were chatting literally from dawn to dusk. We tried to leave, but she just kept talking!

Eika

We don't mind, but she has duties to take care of.

Flandre

Um... like what?

Okina

She's a shinigami ferrywoman. It's her job to guide the spirits of the dead across the river.

Eika

The higher-ups know she's always been lazy, but now they're watching her more closely than ever.

Eika

We're worried she might end up losing her job...

Okina

It's good to see you care about your friend. All right! We'll do our best to help you.

Flandre

Yeah!

Yoshika

But the shinigami getting fired would be good for us.

Seiga

That's right. We'd prefer it if the shinigami and the kishin chiefs kept slacking off.

Okina

I know you own the club, but try not to eavesdrop. The last thing we need is you making our job harder.

Okina

Please leave.

Yoshika

Wh-Whaaaaaat?!

Seiga

Aaaaaaaaaargh! I can't believe she chucked us out the Senkai-chute!

Flandre

Sorry, not sorry!

Urumi & Eika

Hahaha... Thanks.

Okina

But I've never heard of a shinigami getting fired for being lazy. It's kind of hard to imagine...

Eika

Just because it hasn't happened before, doesn't mean it can't. The Yama's been scolding Komachi nonstop.

Eika

What if she really loses her job? *sob* *sob* I don't want that! I like spending time with her!

Flandre

Okina...

Okina

Say no more. Our clients' worries are our worries!

Okina

All right, we'll fix this!

Eika

*sniff* Really? You're going to help Komachi?

Flandre

Helping people is what the Consultation Crew is here for!

Urumi

Thank you! But first, there's something we need you to do...

Consultation Crew

What is it?

Urumi

The Yama being involved in this matter makes it somewhat delicate.

Urumi

If you're not careful, you'll cause unnecessary trouble. Before you get started, we need you to prove yourselves.

Flandre

Huh? Is this, like, a test?

Urumi

We told you our problem, but we're still not sure if we want your help. Just think of this as us being extra careful.

Okina

If this is what it'll take to convince you, then bring it on. But I'm warning you―

Okina

―we're no pushovers!

Eika

Wh-Why did I get dragged into this...?

Urumi

Sorry... But at least now we know they can handle this job.

Eika

Yeah, I'm sure they'll do great. Please, do everything you can to help Komachi.

Consultation Crew

Request accepted!

Flandre

We agreed to help, but how exactly are we gonna do it?

Flandre

Maybe it'd be faster if we went to the Yama directly and asked her not to fire Komachi.

Okina

It'd be fast, yes, but it wouldn't solve the main issue. For that, the shinigami needs to stop slacking off.

Flandre

OK, then we gotta do something to make sure she never plays hooky again... Hehehe.

Okina

That's no good either. If she doesn't feel like she's allowed to take small breaks, she'll end up quitting.

Flandre

Gaaaaah! This is a tough one...

Okina

Maybe the best thing to do would be to get the Yama and the shinigami to sit down and talk.

Okina

The Yama has to compromise on Komachi's workload, and in turn, Komachi has to be more professional.

Flandre

Hmm... Do you think we can get them to agree?

Okina

I don't know. But we have to try.

Okina

We have to create a situation where they feel comfortable speaking honestly to one another.

Okina

First, we need to get ahold of the Yama. With any luck, she isn't swamped with work.

Flandre

Huh? Isn't this the Human Village? Good thing I put sunscreen on.

Okina

Let's see... I'm pretty sure I opened up a door on the Yama's back to get us here.

Eiki

Gosh, you're never going to change, are you?

Eiki

I heard all about the horrible state of your shop and how there's no space to step inside.

Eiki

You even drove the fairies away.

Marisa

I-I had a valid reason for that...!

Eiki

Is it true all the magic tools littering your shop were stolen from around Gensokyo?

Marisa

I didn't steal them. I'm just borrowing them till I die.

Eiki

You think you're mighty clever, don't you?

Eiki

I hope you realize taking things without permission is the definition of stealing. How can you be so childish?!

Marisa

Borrowing, stealing, call it what you want!

Eiki

Stop arguing, and go return what you stole. And then, I suggest you make efforts to improve your selfish ways.

Eiki

That'll be a good start to the long journey you have ahead of you.

Marisa

Sooo... how long are you gonna keep scolding me?

Eiki

It depends on your attitude.

Okina

She seems pretty busy right now.

Flandre

She didn't even notice we came out of her back.

Marisa

Huh? Hey! When did you guys get here?!

Eiki

Huh?!

Marisa

Hah, now's my chance!

Eiki

Hey, wait! I wasn't done scolding you―

Marisa

The Marisa you know is no more! This Marisa is on the road to freedom! Thanks for distracting her, kind meddlers!

Flandre

She just used us to escape...

Okina

Ah, well. At least now we get to talk to the Yama.

Eiki

What do a sage of Gensokyo, a vampire from the Scarlet Devil Mansion... and PLAYER want from me?

Eiki

I can't believe I didn't notice you all sneaking up on me. But more importantly...

Eiki

Who should I hold responsible for letting that thief escape?

Okina

Not us. And anyway, there's a more pressing issue at hand.

Eiki

So that's why you're here... Whatever it is, it'll have to wait. I'm very busy, you see? Farewell.

Flandre

Objection! Aren't you off-duty today?

Eiki

Objection overruled. Even on my day off, I can still be busy. And stop acting like we're in court.

Flandre

If you're so busy on your day off, what's your day on like?!

Eiki

Even busier.

Flandre

Grrrrrr!

Okina

You might be busy, but it isn't work-related, is it? Surely you can spare a little time for us―

Eiki

Pass. I'd prefer to spend my day off scolding people.

Okina

Objection! You prioritizing scolding people over us is in and of itself worthy of scolding!

Eiki

Objection overruled. Scolding people is my hobby, and getting in the way of someone's hobby is nothing short of evil.

Okina

Very well, Your Honor... Now, allow us to cross-examine you!

Eiki

Didn't I tell you to quit acting like we're in court? Besides, you can't cross-examine the presiding judge.

Okina

And you call yourself a Yama! It's a wonder you've lasted this long with that attitude!

Eiki

How childish... But I can't allow my position to be questioned.

Eiki

Go ahead. "Cross-examine" me all you like.

Okina

OK, let me start by asking you this. Do you think you're always right about what you scold people for?

Eiki

Of course.

Okina

And do you think the ones you scold always deserve it?

Eiki

Naturally.

Okina

Care to elaborate?

Eiki

Scolding is a form of course correction. I scold those who have strayed―or look likely to stray―from the righteous path.

Okina

If I'm not mistaken, you were scolding Marisa a moment ago, weren't you?

Eiki

I was.

Okina

But she's already gone to great lengths to improve herself.

Eiki

...What do you mean?

Okina

We, the Consultation Crew, already got her to change her ways.

Okina

Her shop is clean and organized now. Even the fairies have left!

Okina

Thus proving you scolded her under false assumptions based solely on rumors!

Eiki

It can't be...!

Okina

Go ahead, use your ability. Then you'll see I'm telling the truth.

Eiki

Well, yes. I can see you aren't lying.

Eiki

But... all she did was tidy up, right?

Okina

...

Eiki

She still refuses to return everything she's "borrowed." And that's clearly evil.

Okina

...

Okina

That's true!

Flandre

Huh?

Okina

It's hard to overlook her stealing all that stuff...

Okina

Well... I had fun playing court!

Flandre

Okina?

Eiki

Giving up at last, are we? Although, I'll admit I could've handled things better.

Eiki

OK, how about we settle this Gensokyo-style?

Consultation Crew

No objection!

Eiki

I lost... All right, I'll listen to what you have to say.

Okina

There's someone who wants to have a heart-to-heart with you. And for that, you'll have to accompany us to Old Desire.

Eiki

Oh? And who is this someone?

Flandre

It's a surprise!

Eiki

*sigh* Fine. It's not like I have the right to complain after losing the battle.

Okina

Now that's our honorable Yama! Don't worry, you'll find out who it is soon enough!

Okina

OK, the Yama's waiting at the club. Now we need to get Komachi. Come on, Flandre, time is of the essence.

Flandre

Did you see how excited she was to see the bullet show?

Okina

Yes, that was quite unexpected.

Flandre

But we shouldn't keep her waiting too long. Let's go get that shinigami!

Okina

First, we need to come up with a plan.

Okina

With my back door ability, it'd be easy to grab her and force her to talk to the Yama.

Okina

But being dragged in front of her boss wouldn't exactly put her in the mood for an honest, open discussion.

Okina

We need to get her to come with us willingly.

Flandre

Everything would be so much easier with Satori around. We really made her do a lot of the heavy lifting, huh?

I don't think Satori felt that way.

I think she appreciated everyone's support.

Okina

All four of us come together to form the Consultation Crew. None of us could do this alone.

Okina

And I'm sure Satori would've stepped up if it was someone else who needed a break.

Flandre

That's what it means to be a part of a team!

Okina

But there are some things we could've done differently. Let's discuss them together once Satori's recovered.

Flandre

Yeah! For now, let's focus on solving this problem!

Komachi

Ahhh, another peaceful day at the Sanzu River. So calm and relaxing...

Komachi

I could sit here all day watching the water flow by. I hope it stays this way forever...

Komachi

Haha... You want me to take the boat out? Nah, we don't have enough spirits yet.

Komachi

And anyway, you're dead. Not like you've got somewhere to be. Just hang out with me for a bit.

Komachi

Haha, just kidding.

Okina

...She's hopeless. I can't believe the spirits are having to beg her to do her job.

Flandre

Now I get why Eika and Urumi were so worried.

Komachi

Whoa?! Wh-What are two big shots from Gensokyo doing here? And PLAYER's here, too!

Komachi

Oh, are you here 'cause you're tired of life and wanna move on to the other side? Let's see. That'll cost one, two, three...

Okina

Seeing as you're so well-rested, how about giving your jokes a rest too?

Komachi

What do you mean? It might not look like it, but I'm pretty busy, you know? Spirits keep coming to this part of Higan.

Flandre

Yeah... I can see the huge crowd of spirits waiting to cross the river.

Okina

They're not sure what to do, since SOMEONE won't do their job.

Komachi

Don't worry! There aren't that many yet. It's more efficient to wait for them to pile up before taking the boat out.

Flandre

Okina, this is pointless. We gotta do something...

Okina

You've got even Flandre all riled up. I'd be scared if I were you.

Komachi

Nah, that'd just weigh me down. And if I get too heavy, my awesome boat might sink.

Okina

Well, we tried... But Flandre was right―this is pointless.

Okina

I hope you two are with me on this.

Flandre

You don't need to ask! Let's just get this over with!

Even I can't take her side on this...

Komachi

Huh? What are you guys on about?

Okina

QUIET!

Komachi

HUUUUH?!

Komachi

Ow-ow-owww...

Komachi

Huh?! Is this... that wicked hermit's club?! Why have you brought me here?!

Okina

This is all for your own good. ...Actually, it's for the people who care about you.

Flandre

There's someone you have to talk to. If you don't wanna get fired, that is.

Komachi

Fired?! Why would anyone fire me?!

Komachi

Wait. Is that someone...?!

Komachi

You gotta be kidding me!

Flandre

Oh, c'mon, you're already here! You might as well talk to her!

Komachi

S-Stop messing around!

Komachi

I-I've got work to do! I better hurry back!

Okina

Oh, so NOW you've got work to do? The Yama will be here any second. Don't even think about running.

Komachi

I knew it was Lady Eiki! Gaah, I need to get out of here!

Komachi

*sob* I can't get away...

Okina

*huff* *huff* You put up a good fight! You really don't want to do this, do you?

Flandre

You were surprisingly strong... But time's up! Hehehe.

Eiki

Sorry to keep you waiting. I didn't expect the bullet show to be so good!

Komachi

EEEEK!

Eiki

Why, if it isn't Komachi. Aren't you supposed to be working today? What are you doing here...?

Komachi

H-Hahaha, I was just asking myself the same question...

Komachi

Lady Eiki, this is all a big misunderstanding! I swear I'm not skipping out on work!

Eiki

I haven't even said anything yet...

Komachi

Eep!

Okina

She was just enjoying the lovely Sanzu River view. You wouldn't call that slacking off now, would you?

Eiki

Oh, really?

Komachi

I-It's not my fault! There just aren't many spirits showing up these days! I couldn't do my job even if I wanted to!

Flandre

There was a huuuuuuuuuuuge crowd of spirits. They were floating around with absolutely no idea what to do.

Eiki

Oh, reaaally?

Komachi

...

Komachi

I'm sorry! I couldn't motivate myself to work! I'm really sooooorrrrrry!

Eiki

*sigh* I thought so. It's not like this is something new. You've always been lazy.

Eiki

Is that why you brought me here? To inform me of this disgraceful behavior?

Okina

We don't care about this shameless shinigami.

Komachi

Wha...?!

Okina

We asked you to come because Komachi's friends are worried about her negligent attitude toward work.

Okina

They're afraid they won't be able to spend time with her if she gets fired.

Flandre

They came and asked us to help stop that from happening.

Okina

So we decided to get you two to have an open and honest conversation about it.

Okina

We thought if you could reach a compromise, maybe Komachi could keep her job.

Komachi

Now I get it... It was Eika and Urumi that came to you, wasn't it?

Okina

At least you figured out that much.

Komachi

They worry too much. But... I suppose it's nice they care...

Eiki

OK, now I see the whole picture. But there's nothing to discuss here.

Flandre

Huh?!

Komachi

Are you firing me?!

Eiki

No.

Eiki

The way you work is far from praiseworthy, but you get the bare minimum done.

Eiki

I'll continue scolding you about it in the hope of getting you to improve, but I don't plan on firing you.

Komachi

Scold away! I should've known a shinigami wouldn't get fired over something like this!

Okina

Hmm... Does that mean this has all been a waste of time?

Komachi

Sorry you guys put in all that effort for nothing!

Flandre

Don't get ahead of yourself. We aren't done yet.

Komachi

Eek?!

Flandre

You're the reason your friends are worried. Aren't you even a little bit sorry for putting them through that?

Flandre

How is it OK to keep slacking off just 'cause you aren't getting fired?! This is ridiculous!

Eiki

Maybe I was too lenient. None of this would've happened if I had been stricter with her.

Komachi

Um, Lady Eiki... what's with the scary look?

Komachi

You were fine with it just a moment ago...

Eiki

This is a good opportunity to sit and talk about what needs to change.

Komachi

But, uhhh... I need to get back to work. There are a lot of spirits waiting for me...

Eiki

OK, then I'll go to Higan with you. I'll get on your boat and we can talk while you work.

Komachi

There's no escape!

Eiki

There's nothing to escape from. I only want to talk. Hehe, come on, let's go.

Komachi

Wait, no... I, uh... AAAAAAAH!

Flandre

It looks like we took care of that. Problem solved!

Okina

You really seemed to enjoy that...

Eika and Urumi can stop worrying now!

Now we know Komachi won't get fired, it should be OK!

Okina

If we didn't do this, she would've never changed her ways. She needed a scolding more than a heart-to-heart.

Okina

Anyway, it's taken care of now. You two did great, even without Satori here.

Flandre

I'd like to say it was a walk in the park, but...

Flandre

*yawn* I'm so sleepy. We were up all day.

Okina

I'm tired, too. We've been working non-stop since the morning... Let's get some rest.

Sanae

Good job today, everyone! We're just closing up, but you can head home!

Okina

Thanks.

Okina

By the way, how's Satori doing?

Sanae

She's completely fine now! She's over there with Miss Koishi.

Koishi

Geez, Satori! Why d'you have to push yourself so much? Your body needs rest, you know?!

Satori

I know... I really let the team down. I'm sorry you had to see me in my moment of weakness.

Koishi

Don't worry about it. I saw how hard you've been working, so I understand.

Koishi

You were so cool! It made me love you even more!

Satori

...Thank you, Koishi.

Sanae

Ah... sisterly love! Precious is the only word to describe it!

Sanae

Don't you guys agree? ...Huh?

Okina

Zzz... *snore* Satonooo, Maiiii... you're the best...

Flandre

*snore* Zzz... Remilia... that pudding's... mine...

Sanae

Oh, wow. They sure were exhausted.

Sanae

How are you holding up, Miss PLAYER?

I'm at my limit. I should get back to Hakurei Shrine...

Huh? Did you... say... something? Zzz...

Sanae

EEP! Not you too!

Satori

They worked really hard. I don't need to read their minds to know that.

Satori

Rest up, you three. You earned it.

Consultation Crew

Zzz...

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